Ukukhulisa Izingane Ezisathomba—Indima Efezwa Ukuqonda
Ake sithi uvakashele kwelinye izwe futhi awulwazi ulimi lwabantu bakhona. Akungabazeki ukuthi bekuyoba nzima ukukhulumisana—kodwa akuyona into engenakwenzeka. Ngokwesibonelo, isichazamazwi singakusiza ukuba uthole izinkulumo eziyisisekelo zalolo limi. Noma mhlawumbe othile angakuhumushela ukuze ukwazi ukuqonda abanye—futhi nabo bakuqonde.
ABAZALI abakhulisa izingane ngezinye izikhathi baba nomuzwa wokuthi basesimweni esifanayo. Njengolimi lwakwelinye izwe, kungase kube nzima ukuqonda indlela izingane ezisathomba eziziphatha ngayo—kodwa akuyona into engenakwenzeka. Isihluthulelo siwukuba abazali bazame ukuqonda ukuthi kwenzekani ngempela phakathi nalesi sigaba sokukhula esijabulisayo kodwa esivame ukubangela ukudideka.
Okubangela Lokho Kuziphatha
Isifiso sosemusha sokuzimela asilona uphawu lokuvukela ngaso sonke isikhathi. Khumbula, iBhayibheli liyavuma ukuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, “indoda iyoshiya uyise nonina.” (Genesise 2:24) Ukuze ilungele ukusingatha imithwalo ethe xaxa lapho isikhulile, intsha idinga ulwazi oluthile ekwenzeni izinqumo.
Cabangela ukuthi yini okungenzeka iyimbangela yokuziphatha okuphawulwe abazali abacashunwe esihlokweni esandulele.
ULia waseBrithani, wakhononda: “Lapho indodana yami isiyibhobhodleyana, yaqala ukuba nemibono yayo ngokungalindelekile futhi yathambekela kakhulu ekungabazeni igunya lethu.”
Njengabantwana abancane, intsha ivame ukubuza ukuthi, “Kungani?” Kodwa manje impendulo emfushane nelula ingase ingeneli. Kushintsheni? Umphostoli uPawulu wabhala: “Ngesikhathi ngiseyingane, . . . [ngangisebenzisa] ingqondo njengengane.” (1 Korinte 13:11) Njengoba intsha ihlakulela ikhono lokusebenzisa ingqondo, idinga incazelo ethe xaxa ukuze ‘amandla ayo okuqonda’ aqeqesheke.—Hebheru 5:14.
UJohn waseGhana wathi: “Amadodakazi ethu aqala ukuzinyeza, ikakhulukazi ngendlela abukeka ngayo.”
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuyashesha noma kuyephuza ukwenzeka, noma kwenzeka ngesikhathi esifanele, ukukhula ngokushesha ngenkathi yokuthomba kwenza intsha eningi ikhathazeke kakhulu ngokubukeka kwayo. Amantombazane angase ajatshuliswe noma ethuswe ukubona imizimba yawo ithela—noma adideke. Kube sekuba khona ukuphuma izinduna nokusebenzisa izimonyo—okukwenza kube lula ukubona ukuthi kungani intsha ingase ichithe isikhathi esiningi phambi kwesibuko kunasekutadisheni.
UDaniel wasePhilippines wachaza: “Izingane zethu zazivame ukuba nezimfihlo futhi zifuna ukuba zodwa. Zazithanda ukuba nabangane bazo esikhundleni sokuchitha isikhathi nathi.”
Ukuba nezimfihlo kungaba yingozi. (Efesu 5:12) Kodwa ukufuna ukuba wedwa kuhlukile. Ngisho noJesu wakubona kubalulekile ukufuna ‘indawo engenabantu ukuze abe yedwa.’ (Mathewu 14:13) Njengoba intsha ikhula, nayo iyakudinga ukuba yodwa—nokuba abantu abadala bakuhloniphe lokho. Isilinganiso esithile salokhu siyisiza ukuba icabangisise ngezinto—okuyikhono elibalulekile eliyoyisiza lapho isikhulile.
Ngokufanayo, ukufunda ukwakha ubungane kuyingxenye yokukhula. Kuyiqiniso, “ukuzihlanganisa nababi konakalisa imikhuba emihle.” (1 Korinte 15:33) Kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo, kunjengoba iBhayibheli lisho: “Umngane weqiniso ubonisa uthando ngaso sonke isikhathi, futhi ungumfowabo womuntu ozalelwe isikhathi sosizi.” (IzAga 17:17) Ukufunda ukwakha nokulondoloza ubungane obakhayo kuyikhono elibalulekile umuntu akhula nalo.
Lapho bebhekene nanoma yiziphi kulezi zimo ezingenhla, kungakuhle ukuba abazali bazuze ukuqonda ukuze bangabi nombono ongafanele ngokuziphatha kwezingane zabo. Kuyiqiniso, ukuqonda kufanele kuhambisane nokuhlakanipha, ikhono lokusingatha isimo ngendlela eletha imiphumela engcono kakhulu. Abazali bezingane ezisathomba bangakwenza kanjani lokho?
[Amazwi acashunwe esihlokweni ekhasini 5]
Njengoba intsha ihlakulela ikhono lokusebenzisa ingqondo, idinga incazelo ethe xaxa ngemithetho yasekhaya