Intsha Yanamuhla—Izinselele Ebhekana Nazo

“UKUHLOLA kubonisa ukuthi iminyaka yokweva eshumini elinambili ngokungangabazeki iphakathi kwezikhathi zokuphila ezikhungathekisa kakhulu nezicindezela kakhulu.” Wabhala kanjalo uDkt. Bettie B. Youngs encwadini yakhe iHelping Your Teenager Deal With Stress. Ezikhathini ezedlule, intsha yayinokwanele kokukwenza iseyintsha nje. Nokho, ezinsukwini zanamuhla kufanele babhekane nakho kokubili ukucindezeleka kokuba yintsha nokucindezela okunzima kokuphila kwawo-1990 kokuba mdala.

UDkt. Herbert Friedman kumagazini iWorld Health wabhala: “Ushintsho lokusuka ebuntwaneni kuya ekubeni umuntu omdala alukaze ngaphambili lwenzeke enkathini yoshintsho olukhulu kangaka, kungaba ukwanda okungavamile kwenani labantu bomhlaba, ukwenziwa okwandayo kwezindawo zibe amadolobha okuye kwahambisana nakho, kanye nezinguquko ezingokwesayensi yezobuchwepheshe kwezokuxhumana nakwezokuhamba cishe ngokuphazima kweso ezakhe izimo ezingakaze zibonwe ngaphambili.”

Kanjalo enye intombazane esentsha okuthiwa uKathy ithi: “Kunzima ukukhula esikhathini esinjengalesi sethu.” Ukulutha kwezidakamizwa, ukuzibulala, ukusebenzisa kabi uphuzo oludakayo—lokhu ukusabela kwenye intsha ekucindezweleni ‘kwalezinsuku zokugcina’—2 Thimothewu 3:1.

Ukuvukela Emkhayeni

UDkt. Youngs uyakhumbula: “Abazali bethu babenesikhathi sethu. Abaningi bethu babenomama abakwenza umsebenzi wesikhathi esigcwele ukukhulisa abantwana.” Kodwa namuhla, “abesifazane abaningi abakwazi noma bakhetha ukungahlali ekhaya futhi bakhulise abantwana babo isikhathi esigcwele. Bayasebenza futhi kufanele bahlanganise imisebenzi yokuziphilisa nemikhaya. Awekho amahora anele ngosuku; kufanele kuyekwe okuthile. Ngokuvamile kakhulu, lokho okuyekwayo isikhathi nokusekela umzali angakunikeza ingane yakhe. Phakathi nesikhathi esiyingozi kakhulu sokuphila, omusha ushiywa yedwa ukuba abhekane nezinguquko ezingokomzimba, ezingokwengqondo, nezingokomzwelo.”—Helping Your Teenager Deal With Stress.

Ngokungangabazeki eminyakeni yawo-1990 kuzoqhubeka kunoshintsho olukhulu ezimweni zomkhaya olubangelwa isehlukaniso (imishado engamaphesenti angu-50 eUnited States iphela ngesehlukaniso), abantwana abazalelwa ekhaya, kanye nomkhuba owandayo wokuba imibhangqwana ihlale ndawonye nakuba ingashadile. Kakade, cishe umkhaya owodwa kwemine eUnited States unomzali oyedwa. Inani elandayo lemikhaya liyimikhaya yokutholwa eyakheka ngomshado wesibili.

Ingabe izingane ezisemikhayeni enjalo zisengozini yokulimala ngokomzwelo noma ngokwengqondo? Ngokwesibonelo, abanye bathi izingane ezisemikhayeni enomzali oyedwa zithambekele ngokwengeziwe ekubeni nesizungu, ukuba lusizi, kanye nokungalondeki kunezingane ezikhuliswa emikhayeni enabazali ababili. Yiqiniso, imikhaya eminingi enomzali oyedwa kanye nemikhaya yokutholwa isebenza kahle ngaphandle kwengozi ephawulekayo ezinganeni. Nokho, imiBhalo ikwenza kucace ukuthi uNkulunkulu wayehlose ukuba izingane zikhuliswe abazali ababili. (Efesu 6:1, 2) Izimo ezehlukile kulesisimo esingokwemvelo ngokuqinisekile ziletha ukucindezeleka nokukhungatheka okwengeziwe.

Inguquko ekuphileni komkhaya iyaqhubeka nasemazweni amaningi athuthukayo. Lapho, isimo esivamile sasiwumkhaya ohlanganisa abomndeni, lapho wonke amalungu omkhaya angabantu abadala ayenengxenye ekukhuliseni abantwana. Ukwenziwa kwezindawo zibe amadolobha nokwenziwa kwezimboni kuzinqamula ngokushesha izibopho zomkhaya ohlanganisa abomndeni—kanye nokunikeza ukusekela okudingekayo entsheni.

Enye intokazi yaseAfrika iyabhala: “Abekho obabekazi noma ezinye izihlobo zokungeluleka ngalokho okushiwo ukukhula. Abazali balindela ukuba lendaba ixoxwe esikoleni—futhi isikole siyishiyela kubazali. Umqondo wokuthi izingane zingezomphakathi awusekho.”a

Izinkathazo Ezingokomnotho

Intsha futhi ikhathazeka kakhulu ngezomnotho zezwe eziya ziba zimbi. Eqinisweni, intsha engu-4 kwengu-5 ihlala emazweni athuthukayo futhi ingase ibhekane nobumpofu nokungabi namisebenzi ukuphila konke. ULuv oneminyaka engu-17 ubudala, ohlala eNdiya uthi: “Phakathi kwentsha esezweni lakithi, manje kunesilinganiso esikhulu sokuswela umsebenzi, ngakho-ke ingabe kuyamangaza ukuthi intsha iyagula futhi ayijabulile, iba izisulu zokuziphatha okonakele, yeqa emakhaya noma ngisho izibulale?”

Intsha esemazweni acebile aseNtshonalanga inokukhathazeka kwayo ngemali. Ngokwesibonelo, cabangela ukuhlolwa kwentsha yaseU.S. okwabikwa kumagazini iChildren Today: “Lapho ibuzwa ngezindaba eziqondile eziyikhathazayo, intsha yayithambekele ekukhombeni izindaba ezihlobene nemali nekusasa.” Phakathi kwezinto eziphambili eziyishumi ezikhathaza intsha “kwakuwukukhokhela imfundo yasekholeji,” “ukubhekana kwezwe nokwehla kwamandla [omnotho],” “nokungaholi imali eyanele.”

Nokho, ngokudidayo ezinye izazi ezingochwepheshe zikholelwa ukuthi ngisho nentsha okuyihambela kahle ngokwezimali ngokuhamba kwesikhathi iyohlupheka. Umagazini iNewsweek waphawula: “Ngawo-1980, abafundi abathathu kwabane [baseU.S.] asebephothula basesikoleni esiphakeme babesebenza amahora alinganiselwa ku-18 ngesonto futhi ngokuvamile beyisa emakhaya imali engaphezu [kuka-R520] ngenyanga”—ngokunokwenzeka imali yokuzigada engaphezu kwaleyo abazali ababenayo! Kucatshangelwa ukuthi, “lemali yayisetshenziselwa ngokushesha ekuthengeni izimoto, izingubo zokugqoka, imisakazo kanye nezinye izintwana zokwenza ukuphila kobusha bube ntofontofo.”

UBruce Baldwin ongumlobi uphawula ukuthi intsha enjalo “ikhula inamathemba . . . okuthi njalo iyoba nokuphila okuhle lapho ikudinga kungakhathaliseki ukuthi iba nomthwalo wemfanelo kanye nemigomo eyifinyelelayo noma cha.” Kodwa “lapho ishiya ikhaya kusa ngokunye. Isimo esikhohlisayo sasekhaya empeleni singaba ngesihluke ngokuphelele emathembeni angokoqobo endawo yomsebenzi kanye nokudingwa ukusebenza komuntu omdala ovuthiwe kangangokuba ingase ihlangabezane nokuthile okufana nokushaqeka endleleni yokuziphatha komuntu.”

Ukushintsha Imithetho Yokuziphatha Nezindinganiso

Ukushintsha okuphawulekayo ekuziphatheni nezinye izindinganiso nakho kuwumthombo wokukhungatheka kwentsha. “Ubulili . . . ebusheni bukagogo babungaziwa,” kusho uRamani, owesifazane osemusha waseSri Lanka. “Kwakungaxoxwa ngobulili emshadweni, hhayi ngisho nasemkhayeni noma nodokotela, futhi ubulili ngaphandle komshado babungekho.” Nokho, imithetho evimbelayo yakudala inyamalele yonke. Ubika ukuthi: “Ubulili bentsha cishe sebuye baba indlela yokuphila.”

Ngokungamangalisi, lapho kwenziwa ukuhlola kwabafundi besikole esiphakeme (isekhondari) eUnited States, into yesibili eyayibakhathaza ‘kwakuwukuthi kungenzeka bangenwe ingculaza’! Kodwa njengoba manje umnyango “wokuziphatha okusha” usugengelezile, imbalwa intsha ebonakala izimisele ukuyithatha ngokungathi sína noma iyiphi inkulumo yokuwuvala ngokuba nomlingane oyedwa womshado—ingasaphathwa eyokulinda kuze kushadwe. Kunjengoba omunye omusha waseFrance abuza: “Enkathini yethu, ingabe singazibopha ngokuthi sizothembeka kukho konke ukuphila kwethu?” Ingculaza nezinye izifo ezithathelwana ngobulili zizoqhubeka zisongela ukuphila kanye nempilo yentsha eningi.

Hlobo Luni Lwekusasa?

Intsha inokunye ukukhathazeka okubeleselayo. Ithemba lokudla ifa lomhlaba owonakalisiwe—umkhathi wawo ungasenayo iozone, amazinga awo okushisa efinyelele izinga lokushisa okubabazekayo, usuhlutshulwe amahlathi awo avundile, umoya wawo namanzi okungakufanelekele ukuphefumulwa nokuphuzwa—kukhathaza intsha eningi. Nakuba uwohloka njengamanje, ukusongela kwempi yenuzi kwenza enye izibuze ukuthi kazi isintu siyoba nalo yini lona ikusasa!

Khona-ke, kusobala ukuthi intsha namuhla ibhekene nezinselele ezinkulu. Uma ingalutholi usizo, nesiqondiso, injabulo yayo yamanje neyesikhathi esizayo isengozini enkulu. Futhi uma lingekho ithemba lekusasa, awukho umuzwa wokulondeka ongafinyelelwa. Ngokujabulisayo, usizo lwentsha yanamuhla lutholakala kalula.

[Umbhalo waphansi]

[Isithombe ekhasini 6]

Ukwehlukana kwemikhaya ngesehlukaniso no-kuhlala ngokwehlukana kuye kwephuca intsha eningi ukusekela kwabazali okudingekayo