Intsha Iyabuza . . .

Ngingaphila Kanjani Ngingenabazali?

“Lapho ngineminyaka emithathu ubudala, udadewethu enemine, abazali bami bahlukana. Bamangalelana enkantolo besibanga, futhi ekugcineni umama wawina. Nokho, lapho sengineminyaka engu-7, mina nodadewethu sanquma ukuyohlala nobaba.”—UHoracio.

EMINYAKENI ethile kamuva, uyise kaHoracio nentombi ayehlala nayo bahamba—bashiya uHoracio nodadewabo. UHoracio uyakhumbula: “Yilokho okwenza ukuba lapho ngineminyaka engu-18 ubudala, ngibe yinhloko yomkhaya owawubunjwa yimina, udadewethu oneminyaka engu-19 ubudala nodadewethu ngomzali oyedwa oneminyaka engu-12 ubudala—owanquma ukuhlala nathi.”

Njengoba isihloko esidlule sabonisa, intsha eyizigidi emhlabeni wonke izithola ingenabo abazali.a NjengoHoracio, enye intsha iye yalahlwa abazali. Kanti enye iye yalahlekelwa abazali bayo ngokufa noma yahlukana nabo ngenxa yezimpi noma izinhlekelele ezingokwemvelo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi isimo siyini, ukuphila ungenabazali kungaba nzima futhi kube lusizi. Futhi kungakushiya unemithwalo yemfanelo enzima kakhulu.

‘Ngiyonakekelwa Ubani?’

Ukuthi uyokwazi kangakanani ukubhekana nalesi simo kuxhomeke kakhulu ekutheni umdala kangakanani nasekutheni izimo zakho zinjani. Ngokusobala, isimo sisuke sinzima kakhulu uma usemncane noma usanda kweva eminyakeni eyishumi nambili ubudala. Ngisho noma kunjalo, kungenzeka ukuthi awushiyiwe dengwane. Mhlawumbe umalume, ubabekazi, noma umfowenu noma udadewenu omdala uzimisele ukukunakekela.

OFakazi BakaJehova babheka ukunakekela izintandane nabafelokazi njengengxenye yokukhulekela kwabo. (Jakobe 1:27; 2:15-17) Futhi ngokuvamile, abantu abasebandleni bayosiza. Ngokwesibonelo, uHoracio nodadewabo babefunda iBhayibheli noFakazi BakaJehova futhi beya emihlanganweni yabo. Lapho, batholana nomkhaya wamaKristu owaqala ukubasiza. UHoracio uthi: “Ngimbonga kakhulu uJehova ngesiqondiso sakhe nangokusinakekela ngothando usuku nosuku! Sathola isibusiso sokusizwa umkhaya ongokomoya ngempela ebandleni owawunezingane ezingontanga yethu. Kwakusengathi bangabazali bethu bokutholwa, ngakho ngokungefani nanini ngaphambili, sazizwa siyingxenye yomkhaya esasingathembela kuwo.”

Nokho, akuyona yonke intsha eba nenhlanhla kangaka. Umbiko we-United Nations Children’s Fund uthi: “Ngezinye izikhathi izingane ezingenabo abanakekeli ziyiswa emikhayeni ezixhaphazayo ngokomzimba, eziphoqelela ukuba zisebenze ngaphandle kwenkokhelo noma zincishwe amathuba entuthuko, ezisebenzisa njengezifebe noma izigqilaze ngisho nokuzigqilaza.” Ngakho uma kunothile okunakekela kahle, bonga.

Kuyavunywa ukuthi ukuphila ngaphandle kwabazali bakho kuwukulahlekelwa okukhulu. Futhi kungokwemvelo ukuba ungajabuli ngokuthi abekho ukuze bakunakekele. Ukutshelwa yisihlobo noma umfowenu noma udadewenu omdala lokho okumelwe ukwenze kungakucasula nakakhulu. Kodwa ungabathukutheleli abantu abazama ukukunakekela. IBhayibheli lithi: “Xwaya ukuba ulaka [lungakuvuseli izenzo ezinonya] . . . Xwaya ukuba ungabhekisi ubuso bakho ebubini.” (Jobe 36:18, 21) Khumbula owesifazane osemusha eBhayibhelini okuthiwa u-Esteri. Njengentandane, wakhuliswa umzala wakhe omdala uMoridekayi. Nakuba uMoridekayi ayengeyena umzali wakhe ongokwemvelo, ‘wamyala,’ futhi u-Esteri walela, ngisho nalapho esekhulile! (Esteri 2:7, 15, 20) Zama ukulalela futhi ube nomoya wokubambisana. Kuyozinciphisa kakhulu izingxabano futhi kwenze ukuphila kwabo bonke abathintekayo kube lula.

Umthwalo Wemfanelo Womkhaya

Uma unomfowenu noma udadewenu omdala—noma uma usukhule ngokwanele—mhlawumbe wena nezingane zakini ningakwazi ukuhlala nodwa. Kungase kudingeke nokuba uthathe indima yokuba yinhloko yomkhaya—okubonakala kuwumthwalo wemfanelo onzima! Nokho, ezimweni ezinjalo intsha eningi iye yenza umsebenzi oncomekayo wokukhulisa izingane zakubo.

Kuyaqondakala ukuthi ungase ube nemizwa yokucasuka. Ukucabanga ngeqiniso lokuthi uyabathanda futhi uyabakhathalela abafowenu nodadewenu kungase kukusize ukuba ube nombono oqondile. Kungase kukusize futhi uma ubheka ukubanakekela njengomsebenzi owabelwe uNkulunkulu. Phela, amaKristu ayalwa ukuba anakekela abakubo. (1 Thimothewu 5:8) Kodwa ngisho noma ungazama ngokusemandleni akho ukuba ubaba noma umama wezingane zakini, awusoze ngempela waba umzali wazo.

Akunangqondo ukulindela ukuba izingane zakini zikulalele ngendlela ezazibalalela ngayo abazali bakho. Eqinisweni, kungase kuthathe isikhathi eside ngaphambi kokuba zizivumelanise nesimo futhi zikulalele. Ngakho okwamanje, zama ukuba ungakhungatheki. Gwema “ukufutheka okubi nentukuthelo nolaka nokuklabalasa nenkulumo echaphayo.” Ngesibonelo sakho, fundisa izingane zakini ukuba ‘zibe nomusa komunye nomunye, zibe nobubele besisa, zithethelelane ngokukhululekile.’—Efesu 4:31, 32.

UHoracio uyavuma ukuthi wayewenza amaphutha: “Ngezinye izikhathi ngangiziphatha ngesandla esiqinile izingane zakithi. Kodwa lokho kwakuyisivikelo ngandlela-thile, futhi salondoloza ukuziphatha okuhle emehlweni kaJehova.”

Ukuzondla

Uma bengekho abazali abakunakekelayo, akungabazeki ukuthi ukuzondla ngezinto ezibonakalayo kubangela ukukhathazeka okukhulu. Mhlawumbe amanye amalungu asekhulile ebandleni lobuKristu anganisiza wena nezingane zakini, uma zikhona, ukuba nifunde ukupheka, ukuhlanza nokunakekela eminye imisebenzi yasekhaya osekumelwe niyenze manje. Kodwa nizoyithola kanjani imali? Mhlawumbe akukho eningakwenza ngaphandle kokuzama ukuthola umsebenzi.

Nokho, intsha engenamfundo, ulwazi noma amakhono emisebenzi ayiyitholi imisebenzi. Ngakho uma kunendlela yokuphothula izifundo zakho eziyisisekelo—noma ngisho nokukuqeqeshelwa umsebenzi othile—isebenzise ngokugcwele. UHoracio uyakhumbula: “Mina nodadewethu omdala sasisebenza ukuze sikhokhele izindleko zami zesikole nezikadadewethu ngomzali oyedwa.” Uma nihlala ezweni elisathuthuka, kungase kudingeke ukuba usebenzise ubuhlakani ukuze uthole umsebenzi.—Bheka isihloko esithi “Ukuvula Imisebenzi Emazweni Asathuthuka,” kuyi-Phaphama! ka-October 22, 1994.

Emazweni athuthukile kwezomnotho, ningase nithole usizo lwezimali kuhulumeni. Ngokuvamile, kunezinhlangano zikahulumeni noma ezizimele ezizimisele ukusiza izingane ezingenabazali noma ezilahliwe. Ngokwesibonelo, ezinye izinhlangano zingase zinisize nithole ukudla noma indawo yokuhlala. Yiqiniso, noma yiluphi usizo lwezimali enilutholayo kufanele nilusebenzise ngokuhlakanipha. IBhayibheli lithi: ‘Imali ingeyesivikelo.’ (UmShumayeli 7:12, NW) Uma ningacopheleli endleleni enilondoloza futhi nisebenzise ngayo imali, ngokushesha ‘ingazenzela amaphiko indize.’—IzAga 23:4, 5.

Kungase kungabi inkathazo ukuzinakekela uma kunomuntu omdala okunakekelayo. Nokho, esikhathini esizayo kuyofika isikhathi lapho kuyodingeka ukuba uzondle wena. Njengoba ungasenabo abazali abakukhuthazayo kwezemfundo, kungase kudingeke umzamo omkhulu wokugxila ezifundweni zakho. Iseluleko umphostoli uPawulu ongumKristu asinika uThimothewu ngokuphathelene nentuthuko engokomoya singasetshenziswa nasezifundweni zakho zesikole: “Zindla ngalezizinto; ugxile kuzo, ukuze intuthuko yakho ibonakale.” (1 Thimothewu 4:15) Ngokwenza kanjalo, uyobabekela isibonelo esihle abantu abakuzungezile futhi uzuze.

Okubaluleke nakakhulu isidingo sokuba uzinakekele ngokomoya. Zama ukuba nesimiso esilinganiselayo semisebenzi engokomoya. (Filipi 3:16) Ngokwesibonelo, imikhaya yoFakazi BakaJehova inomkhuba wokuxoxa ngombhalo weBhayibheli nsuku zonke. Kungani ungakwenzi kube umkhuba lokhu? Umkhuba wokutadisha iBhayibheli nokuba khona njalo emihlanganweni yobuKristu uyokusiza ukuba uhlale uqinile ngokomoya.—Heberu 10:24, 25.

Ukubhekana Nenselele

Ukuphila ngaphandle kwabazali kunzima, kodwa akusona isimo esingenalo ithemba. Unina kaPaola oneminyaka engu-20 ubudala washona lapho uPaola eneminyaka eyisithupha nje kuphela. Uyise washona lapho eneminyaka eyishumi. Owesifazane othile onomusa wabathatha yena nodadewabo abane. Ingabe ukuphila kwakhe bekugcwele usizi kuphela? Cha. UPaola uthi: “Mhlawumbe asiwona umkhaya ngomqondo ophelele, kodwa siphila kahle kakhulu. Eqinisweni, uthando esinalo phakathi kwethu luqine ngaphezu kolwemikhaya eminingi.”

Udadewabo kaPaola u-Irene uyanezela: “Nakuba singenabo abazali, siyafana nje nenye intsha.” Ubeluleka ngokuthini abanye abakulesi simo? “Ningabi nomuzwa wokuthi kuphelile ngani.” UHoracio naye uthi: “Lesi simo sangenza ngakhula ngokushesha.”

Ukulahlekelwa abazali kungesinye sezenzakalo ezibuhlungu kakhulu. Nokho, qiniseka ukuthi ngosizo lukaJehova, ungaphila futhi uthole isibusiso sakhe.

[Imibhalo yaphansi]

[Isithombe ekhasini 26]

Abadala abangamaKristu bangakusekela