Zikhandle Ukuze Usindise Umkhaya Wakho

“Nibondle ngokuyala nangokuqondisa kweNkosi.”—EFESU 6:4.

1, 2. Yiziphi izinselele abazali ababhekene nazo namuhla?

UMAGAZINI othandwayo wazibiza ngokuthi ushintsho olukhulu. Lokhu kwakukumagazini owawuchaza izinguquko ezishaqisayo eziye zaba khona emkhayeni eminyakeni yamuva nje. Kuye kwathiwa lezizinguquko “ziwumphumela wobhadane lwesehlukaniso, ukushada kabusha, ukwehlukanisa kwesibili, ubuvezandlebe, nezinkinga ezintsha emikhayeni ehlala ndawonye.” Ukucindezela nezinkinga ezinjalo akumangalisi, ngoba iBhayibheli labikezela ukuthi abantu babeyobhekana ‘nezikhathi ezinzima’ phakathi ‘nalezizinsuku zokugcina.’—2 Thimothewu 3:1-5.

² Ngakho-ke abazali namuhla babhekana nezinselele ezazingaziwa ezizukulwaneni ezidlule. Nakuba abanye abazali phakathi kwethu beye bakhulisa izingane zabo ngezindlela zokwesaba uNkulunkulu “kusukela ebuntwaneni,” imikhaya eminingi isanda kuqala ‘ukuhamba eqinisweni.’ (2 Thimothewu 3:15; 3 Johane 4) Kungenzeka ukuthi izingane zabo zase zindala lapho beqala ukuzifundisa izindlela zikaNkulunkulu. Ngaphezu kwalokho, kunenani elandayo phakathi kwethu lemikhaya enomzali ongayedwa nemikhaya yokutholwa. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ziyini izimo zenu, isiyalo sikamphostoli uPawulu siyasebenza: “Nibondle ngokuyala nangokuqondisa kweNkosi.”—Efesu 6:4.

Abazali AbangamaKristu Nezindima Zabo

3, 4. (a) Yiziphi izici eziye zabangela ukuba indima yobaba ishabalale? (b) Kungani obaba abangamaKristu kungamelwe babe abondli nje kuphela?

³ Phawula ukuthi uPawulu ngokuyinhloko wabhekisela amazwi akhe akweyabase-Efesu 6:4 ‘koyise.’ Omunye umlobi uchaza ukuthi ezizukulwaneni ezidlule “obaba babenomthwalo wemfanelo wokukhulisa izingane zabo ngokokuziphatha nangokomoya; obaba babenomthwalo wemfanelo wokufundisa izingane zabo. . . . Kodwa iNguquko Yezomnotho iyakushabalalisa lokhu kusondelana; obaba bashiya amapulazi abo nezitolo, bashiya amakhaya abo bayosebenza emafekthri futhi kamuva emahhovisi. Omama benza imisebenzi eminingi ngaphambili eyayenziwa obaba. Ngokwandayo, ububaba baba into engeyona engokoqobo.”

⁴ Madoda angamaKristu: Musani ukwaneliswa ukuba abondli nje, nishiyela konke ukuqeqeshwa nokukhuliswa kwezingane zenu komkenu. IzAga 24:27 zanxusa obaba bangezikhathi zasendulo: “Qeda umsebenzi wakho ngaphandle, uzilungiselele wona ensimini, wakhe ngasemuva indlu yakho.” Ngokufanayo nanamuhla, njengendoda esebenzayo, kungase kudingeke usebenze isikhathi eside futhi uzikhandle ukuze wondle umkhaya. (1 Thimothewu 5:8) Nokho, kamuva, siza ube nesikhathi ‘sokwakha indlu yakho’—ngokomzwelo nangokomoya.

5. Abafazi abangamaKristu bangakusebenzela kanjani ukusindiswa kwemikhaya yabo?

⁵ Bafazi abangamaKristu: Nani futhi kumelwe nizikhandle ukuze kusindiswe imikhaya yenu. IzAga 14:1 zithi: “Owesifazane ohlakaniphileyo uyakha indlu yakhe.” Njengabangane bomshado, wena nomyeni wakho nihlanganyela umthwalo wemfanelo wokuqeqesha izingane zenu. (IzAga 22:6; Malaki 2:14) Lokhu kungase kuhlanganise ukuyala izingane zenu, ukuzilungiselela imihlangano yobuKristu nenkonzo yasensimini, noma ngisho nokuqhuba isifundo somkhaya lapho umyeni wakho engenakukwazi ukwenza kanjalo. Futhi ungenza okuningi ukuze ufundise izingane zakho amakhono okuphatha indlu, imikhuba emihle, inhlanzeko engokomzimba, nezinye izinto eziningi eziwusizo. (Thithu 2:5) Lapho amadoda nabafazi besebenza ndawonye ngalendlela, bangahlangabezana kangcono nezidingo zezingane zabo. Ziyini ngempela ezinye zalezozidingo?

Ukunakekela Izidingo Zazo Ezingokomzwelo

6. Iyiphi indima omama nobaba abayifezayo ekukhuleni okungokomzwelo kwezingane zabo?

⁶ Lapho “umdlezane ondla abantwana bakhe,” bazizwa bevikelekile, belondekile, bethandwa. (1 Thesalonika 2:7; IHubo 22:9) Bambalwa omama abangamelana nesifiso sokunikeza izinsana zabo ukunakekela okukhulu. Umprofethi u-Isaya wabuza: “Owesifazane angakhohlwa umntwana wakhe oncelayo ukuba angabi-namusa kuyo indodana yesizalo sakhe na?” (Isaya 49:15) Ngakho omama bafeza indima ebalulekile ekukhuleni okungokomzwelo kwezingane. Nokho, obaba nabo bafeza indima ebalulekile kulokhu. UPaul Lewis ofundisa ngemikhaya uthi: “Angikaze ngibone nesisodwa isisebenzi sezenhlalakahle esake sezwa ingane [eyihlongandlebe] ithi inobuhlobo obuhle noyise. Akukho neyodwa emakhulwini amaningi.”

7, 8. (a) Yibuphi ubufakazi obukhona besibopho esiqinile phakathi kukaJehova uNkulunkulu neNdodana yakhe? (b) Obaba bangasiqinisa kanjani isibopho sothando nezingane zabo?

⁷ Ngakho-ke kubalulekile ukuba obaba abangamaKristu ngokucophelela bahlakulele isibopho sothando nezingane zabo. Ngokwesibonelo, cabanga ngoJehova uNkulunkulu noJesu Kristu. Lapho uJesu ebhapathizwa, uJehova wamemezela: “Wena uyiNdodana yami ethandekayo; [ngikwamukele, NW].” (Luka 3:22) Kuningi okushiwo yilawomazwi ambalwa! UJehova (1) wayeyiqaphela iNdodana yakhe, (2) walubonisa obala uthando lwakhe ngoJesu, futhi (3) wakwenza kwaziwa ukuthi uyamamukela uJesu. Nokho, lesi akusona kuphela isikhathi uJehova abonisa ngaso uthando lwakhe ngeNdodana yakhe. Kamuva uJesu wathi kuYise: “Wangithanda, kungakasekelwa izwe.” (Johane 17:24) Nokho, awakudingi yini ngempela wonke amadodana namadodakazi alalelayo ukuqashelwa, uthando nokwamukelwa oyise?

⁸ Uma ungubaba, cishe ungenza okuningi ukuze uqinise isibopho sothando nezingane zakho ngokubonakalisa uthando ngendlela efanele engokoqobo nangamazwi ngaso sonke isikhathi. Kuyavunywa, kunzima kwamanye amadoda ukubonisa uthando lwawo, ikakhulukazi uma oyise bengakaze bawabonise uthando obala. Kodwa ngisho nomzamo ongelula wokubonisa uthando ezinganeni zakho ungaba nethonya elinamandla. Phela, “uthando luyakha.” (1 Korinte 8:1) Uma izingane zakho zizizwa zilondekile ngenxa yothando lwakho lobuzali, ziyothambekela kakhulu ekubeni ‘amadodana namadodakazi angempela’ futhi ziyozizwa zikhululekile ukukuthululela isifuba.—IzAga 4:3.

Ukunakekela Izidingo Zazo Ezingokomoya

9. (a) Abazali abangama-Israyeli abesaba uNkulunkulu bazinakekela kanjani izidingo ezingokomoya zemikhaya yabo? (b) Yimaphi amathuba amaKristu anawo okufundisa izingane zawo ngokwethukela?

⁹ Izingane nazo zinezidingo ezingokomoya. (Mathewu 5:3) UMose wanxusa abazali abangama-Israyeli: “Lawamazwi engikuyala ngawo namuhla ayakuba-senhliziyweni yakho, ubafundise impela wona abantwana bakho, uwakhulume lapho uhlezi endlini yakho, nalapho uhamba endleleni, nalapho ulala, nalapho uvuka.” (Duteronomi 6:6, 7) Uma ungumzali ongumKristu, ungenza okuningi ukuze ufundise ngokwethukela, njengalapho “uhamba endleleni.” Isikhathi esisetshenziswa nihamba ndawonye emotweni yomkhaya, niyothenga, noma nihamba ndawonye nezingane zenu endlini ngendlu enkonzweni yobuKristu sinikeza amathuba amahle okudlulisela isiyalo esimweni esikhululekile. Izikhathi zokudla ziyizikhathi ezinhle ngokukhethekile zokuba imikhaya ixoxe. “Sisebenzisa isikhathi sokudla ukuze sixoxe ngezinto eziye zenzeka phakathi nosuku,” kuchaza omunye umzali.

10. Kungani isifundo somkhaya siyinselele ngezinye izikhathi, futhi abazali kumelwe bazimisele ukwenzani?

¹⁰ Nokho, imfundo ehleliwe ngesifundo seBhayibheli sasikhathi sonke nezingane zakho nayo ibalulekile. Kuyavunywa, “ubuwula buboshelwe enhliziyweni” yabantwana. (IzAga 22:15) Abanye abazali bathi izingane zabo zingasiphazamisa kalula isifundo somkhaya. Kanjani? Ngokulokhu ziyaluza futhi zibonakale zibhocobele, ngokwenza iziphazamiso ezicasulayo (njengokulwa nezilamana nazo), noma ngokushaya sengathi aziwanaki amaqiniso ayisisekelo eBhayibheli. Uma lokhu kuqhubeka kuze kube sezingeni lokubona ukuthi intando kabani eyogcina, intando yomzali kumelwe kube yiyona egcinayo. Abazali abangamaKristu akumelwe badikibale futhi bavumele izingane zibuse ikhaya.—Qhathanisa neyabaseGalathiya 6:9.

11. Isifundo somkhaya singenziwa kanjani sijabulise?

¹¹ Uma izingane zenu zingasijabuleli isifundo somkhaya, mhlawumbe kungenziwa izinguquko ezithile. Ngokwesibonelo, ingabe isifundo sisetshenziswa njengezaba zokubukeza ukushiyeka kwamuva kwezingane zenu? Mhlawumbe kuyoba ngcono ukuxoxa ngezinkinga ezinjalo ngasese. Ingabe isifundo senu nisiqhuba njalo? Uma nisiyeka ngenxa yombukiso othandwayo wethelevishini noma ezemidlalo, cishe izingane zenu azinakusithatha ngokungathi sína isifundo. Ingabe niqotho futhi niyashiseka endleleni eniqhuba ngayo isifundo? (Roma 12:8) Yebo, isifundo kumelwe sijabulise. Zamani ukugcina zonke izingane zihilelekile. Yibani nombono oqondile futhi nakhe, nizituse ngokufudumele izingane zenu ngokuhlanganyela kwazo. Yebo, ningamane nje nihlanganise ukwaziswa, kodwa zamani ukufinyelela izinhliziyo.—IzAga 23:15.

Ukuyala Ekulungeni

12. Kungani isiyalo singahileli ukujezisa ngenduku ngaso sonke isikhathi?

¹² Futhi izingane zisidinga kakhulu isiyalo. Njengomzali, kufanele uzibekele imingcele. IzAga 13:24 zithi: “Oyeka uswazi uyazonda indodana yakhe, kepha oyithandayo uyayilaya ngesineke.” Nokho, iBhayibheli alisho ukuthi ngaso sonke isikhathi isiyalo kufanele sinikezwe ngenduku. IzAga 8:33 zithi: “Yizwani ukulaya,” futhi sitshelwa ukuthi “insolo ingena koqondileyo kunemivimbo eyikhulu koyisiwula.”—IzAga 17:10.

13. Kufanele sinikezwe kanjani isiyalo ezinganeni?

¹³ Ngezinye izikhathi, ukuyala ngenduku kungase kufaneleke. Nokho, uma kunikezwa ngentukuthelo, cishe kuyokweqisa futhi kungasebenzi. IBhayibheli liyaxwayisa: “Boyise, ningabathukuthelisi abantwana benu ukuba bangadangali.” (Kolose 3:21) Ngempela, “ukucindezela kuyamhlanyisa ohlakaniphileyo.” (UmShumayeli 7:7) Omusha odangele angase avukele ngisho nezindinganiso zokulunga. Ngakho abazali kufanele basebenzise imiBhalo ukuze bayale izingane zabo ekulungeni ngendlela eqinile kodwa elinganiselayo. (2 Thimothewu 3:16) Isiyalo sokwesaba uNkulunkulu sinikezwa ngothando nobumnene.—Qhathanisa neyesi-2 Thimothewu 2:24, 25.a

14. Yini abazali okufanele bayenze uma bezizwa bethambekela ekubeni yizififane?

¹⁴ Yebo, ‘sonke siyakhubeka kaningi.’ (Jakobe 3:2) Ngisho nomzali onothando ngokuvamile angase anqotshwe ukucindezela kwangalesosikhathi futhi asho okuthile okungenamusa noma abonise intukuthelo. (Kolose 3:8) Uma lokho kungenzeka, ungavumeli ukuba ilanga lishone ingane yakho ikhathazeke kakhulu noma wena ngokwakho usathukuthele. (Efesu 4:26, 27) Lungisa izindaba nengane yakho, uxolise uma lokho kubonakala kufanele. (Qhathanisa noMathewu 5:23, 24.) Ukubonisa ukuthobeka okunjalo kunganenza nisondelane kakhulu wena nengane yakho. Uma uzwa ukuthi awukwazi ukulawula intukuthelo yakho futhi uyisififane, funa usizo kubadala bebandla abamisiwe.

Imikhaya Enomzali Ongayedwa Nemikhaya Yokutholwa

15. Zingasizwa kanjani izingane ezisemikhayeni enomzali ongayedwa?

¹⁵ Nokho, akuzona zonke izingane ezisekelwa yibo bobabili abazali. E-United States, ingane eyodwa kwezine ikhuliswa umzali ongayedwa. ‘Izintandane’ zazivamile ezikhathini zeBhayibheli, futhi ukukhathalelwa kwazo kukhulunywa ngakho ngokuphindaphindiwe emiBhalweni. (Eksodusi 22:22) Namuhla, ngokufanayo, amakhaya amaKristu anomzali ongayedwa abhekene nokucindezela nezinkinga, kodwa ayaduduzeka ngokwazi ukuthi uJehova ‘unguyise wezintandane, umahluleli wabafelokazi.’ (IHubo 68:5) AmaKristu anxuswa ukuba ‘anakekele izintandane nabafelokazi osizini lwabo.’ (Jakobe 1:27) Esikholwa nabo bangenza okuningi ukusiza imikhaya enomzali ongayedwa.b

16. (a) Yini abazali abangabodwa okufanele bayenze ngenxa yemikhaya yabo? (b) Kungani ukuyala kungase kube nzima, kodwa kungani kumelwe kunikezwe?

¹⁶ Uma ungumzali ongayedwa, yini wena ngokwakho ongayenza ukuze uzuzise umkhaya wakho? Kudingeka ukhuthalele isifundo seBhayibheli somkhaya, ukuba khona emihlanganweni, nenkonzo yasensimini. Nokho, ukuyala kungase kube umsebenzi onzima ngokukhethekile. Mhlawumbe uselusizi ngenxa yokushonelwa umngane womshado othandekayo. Noma kungenzeka ukuthi usalwisana nemizwa yecala noma ukuthukuthela ngenxa yokuchitheka komshado. Uma umthetho ufuna ukuba nibanakekele nobabili abantwana, ungase ngisho wesabe nokuthi ingane yakho ingase ikhethe ukuhlala nomngane enihlala ngokwehlukana naye noma enenze naye isehlukaniso. Izimo ezinjalo zingase zikwenze kube nzima ngokomzwelo ukunikeza isiyalo esilinganiselayo. Nokho, iBhayibheli lisitshela ukuthi “umntwana oyekwayo uyahlazisa unina.” (IzAga 29:15) Ngakho ungakuvumeli ukuzizwa unecala, uzisola, noma ucindezelekile ngokomzwelo ngowayengumngane wakho womshado. Zibekele izindinganiso ezinengqondo nezingaguquguquki. Ungayekethisi ezimisweni zeBhayibheli.—IzAga 13:24.

17. Zingathuntubezwa kanjani izindima zamalungu omkhaya emkhayeni onomzali ongayedwa, futhi yini engenziwa ukuze kuvinjelwe lokhu?

¹⁷ Nokho, izinkinga zingaphakama uma umama ongayedwa ephatha indodana yakhe njengethathe isikhundla somngane wakhe womshado—umnumzane wendlu—noma indodakazi yakhe njengomuntu athululela kuye isifuba, emthwesa izinkinga eziyisifuba sakhe. Ukwenza kanjalo akufanele futhi kuyayikhungathekisa ingane. Lapho izindima zomzali nomntwana zithuntubezwa, isiyalo singawohloka. Makwazeke ukuthi wena ungumzali. Uma ungumama odinga iseluleko esisekelwe eBhayibhelini, sifune kubadala noma mhlawumbe kudade ovuthiwe osekhulile.—Qhathanisa noThithu 2:3-5.

18, 19. (a) Yiziphi ezinye zezinselele imikhaya yokutholwa ebhekene nazo? (b) Abazali nezingane emkhayeni wokutholwa bangakubonisa kanjani ukuhlakanipha nokuqonda?

¹⁸ Imikhaya yokutholwa nayo ibhekene nezinselele. Ngokuvamile, osingamzali bathola ukuthi “ukuthandwa ngokushesha” akuvamile. Ngokwesibonelo, izingane zokutholwa zingase zikhathazeke kakhulu ngenxa yanoma yisiphi isenzo esibonakala siwukukhetha izingane zabo bobabili abazali. (Qhathanisa noGenesise 37:3, 4.) Eqinisweni, lezizingane zokutholwa kungenzeka zilwisana nosizi lomzali owahamba futhi zesaba ukuthi ukuthanda usingamzali kungase ngandlela-thile kube ukungathembeki kuyise noma unina ongokwemvelo. Imizamo yokunikeza isiyalo esidingekile ingase ihlangabezane nesikhumbuzo solaka esithi, ‘Awuyena umzali wami wangempela!’

¹⁹ IzAga 24:3 zithi: “Indlu iyakhiwa ngokuhlakanipha, iqiniswe ngokuqonda.” Yebo, kudingeka ukuhlakanipha nokuqonda kubo bonke ukuze umkhaya wokutholwa uphumelele. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, izingane kumelwe zilamukele iqiniso elivame ukuba buhlungu lokuthi izinto zishintshile. Osingamzali ngokufanayo kungase kudingeke bafunde ukuba nesineke nozwela, bangasheshi bacasuke lapho bebhekene nalokho okubonakala kuwukungafunwa. (IzAga 19:11; UmShumayeli 7:9) Ngaphambi kokuba uthathe indima yokunikeza isiyalo, sebenzela ukwakha ubungane nengane yokutholwa. Kuze kube yilapho isibopho esinjalo sesakhiwe, abanye bangase bakucabangele njengokungcono ukushiyela kumzali ongokwemvelo ukuba anikeze isiyalo. Lapho kuphakama izinkinga, kumelwe kwenziwe imizamo yokukhulumisana. “Kwabalulekwayo kukhona ukuhlakanipha,” kusho izAga 13:10.c

Qhubekani Nisebenzela Ukusindiswa Komkhaya Wenu!

20. Yini izinhloko zemikhaya yamaKristu okufanele ziqhubeke ziyenza?

²⁰ Imikhaya yamaKristu eqinile ayibi khona ngengozi. Nina zinhloko zemikhaya kumelwe niqhubeke nizikhandla ukuze nisindise imikhaya yenu. Yibani ngabaqaphile, niphawula izici ezimbi noma ukuthambekela kwezwe. Bekani isibonelo esihle ekukhulumeni, ukuziphatha, uthando, ukholo, nobumsulwa. (1 Thimothewu 4:12) Bonakalisani izithelo zomoya kaNkulunkulu. (Galathiya 5:22, 23) Isineke, ukucabangela, ukuthethelela, nesisa kuyoqinisa imizamo yenu yokufundisa izingane zenu izindlela zikaNkulunkulu.—Kolose 3:12-14.

21. Isimo esifudumele, esijabulisayo singalondolozwa kanjani ekhaya lomuntu?

²¹ Ngosizo lukaNkulunkulu, zamani ukulondoloza umoya ojabulisayo, ofudumele emakhaya enu. Chithani isikhathi nindawonye njengomkhaya, nilwele ukudla okungenani isidlo esisodwa ndawonye usuku ngalunye. Imihlangano yobuKristu, inkonzo yasensimini, nesifundo somkhaya kubalulekile. Nokho, kukhona futhi “isikhathi sokuhleka . . . nesikhathi sokusina.” (UmShumayeli 3:1, 4) Yebo, hlelani izikhathi zokuzilibazisa okwakhayo. Ukuvakashela amamnyuziyamu, ama-zoo, nezindawo ezinjalo kuyajabulisa emkhayeni wonke. Noma ningase nicishe i-TV futhi nisebenzise lesosikhathi nihlabelela, nilalele umculo, nidlala imidlalo, futhi nixoxa. Lokhu kungawusiza umkhaya ukuba usondelane ndawonye.

22. Kungani kufanele nizikhandle ukuze nisindise umkhaya wenu?

²² Kwangathi nonke nina bazali abangamaKristu ningaqhubeka nisebenzela ukujabulisa uJehova ngokugcwele “nithela izithelo emisebenzini yonke elungileyo, nikhula ekumazini uNkulunkulu.” (Kolose 1:10) Yakhelani umkhaya wenu esisekelweni esiqinile sokulalela iZwi likaNkulunkulu. (Mathewu 7:24-27) Futhi qinisekani ukuthi imizamo yenu yokukhulisa izingane zenu “ngokuyala nangokuqondisa kweNkosi” iyothola ukwamukelwa.—Efesu 6:4.

[Imibhalo yaphansi]

Ubungaphendula Kanjani?

◻ Indoda nomfazi bangabambisana kanjani ekwakheni umkhaya wabo?

◻ Yiziphi ezinye izidingo ezingokomzwelo zezingane, futhi kungahlangatshezwana kanjani nazo?

◻ Izinhloko zemikhaya zingazifundisa kanjani izingane zazo ngendlela ehleliwe nangokwethukela?

◻ Abazali bangayala kanjani ekulungeni?

◻ Yini engenziwa ukuze kuzuze imikhaya enomzali ongayedwa nemikhaya yokutholwa?

[Isithombe ekhasini 16]

Uthando lukababa nokwamukelwa kubalulekile ekukhuleni kwengane ngokomzwelo