Ikhishi Lingaba Indawo Ejabulisayo

“PHUMA ekhishini!” Abantwana abaningi abalambile baye bathola leso sixwayiso lapho bezama ukunambitha kusengaphambili ukudla kwakusihlwa. Nokho, kunokuba babaxoshe, abazali banesizathu esihle sokumemela abantwana babo ekhishini. Ngani? Ngoba eqinisweni ikhishi liyigumbi lokufundela elikhangayo.

Ikhishi liyindawo lapho abantwana bengathuthukisa khona amakhono okusungula izinto nawokuxazulula izinkinga, indawo lapho bengafunda khona ukukhonza abanye nokusebenza njengengxenye yeqembu, indawo lapho kungaqala khona izingxoxo ezakhayo ezithinta inhliziyo, indawo lapho izindinganiso ezaziswa ngokujulile zingafundiswa khona buthule. Yebo, emakhabetheni aminyene nasemadiloweni nasemashalofini ekhishi ngalinye kunezifundo eziningi eziyigugu—ezingatholakala lapho kulungiselelwa isidlo esilandelayo.

Kulenkathi yobuchwepheshe nolwazi, kungani kusetshenziswa ikhishi njengendawo yokuqeqeshela abantwana? Impendulo isikhathi. Abazali abaningi bayaqaphela ukuthi ayikho into engathatha isikhundla sokuchitha isikhathi nabantwana babo—ukuchitha isikhathi esiningi!a Inkinga iwukuthi singatholakalaphi. Abanye ochwepheshe bakhuthaza abazali ukuba babheke umsebenzi oyinsakavukela abawenza ekhaya njengethuba lokwenza izinto nabantwana babo nokubafundisa. Lokhu kuvumelana nomyalo uNkulunkulu awunikeza abazali esizweni sakwa-Israyeli wasendulo: “Lawamazwi engikuyala ngawo namuhla ayakuba-senhliziyweni yakho, ubafundise impela wona abantwana bakho, uwakhulume lapho uhlezi endlini yakho, nalapho uhamba endleleni, nalapho ulala, nalapho uvuka.”—Duteronomi 6:6, 7.

Ngenxa yokuthi ngokuvamile kudingeka sichithe isikhathi esiningi ekhishini, kungabonakala kuyindawo ekahle lapho singahlanganyela khona imisebenzi yomkhaya. Futhi ngokungafani namathuba okushaywa umoya akhethekile, ngokuvamile okudingeka ukuba silinde kuze kube yilapho sesinesikhathi, amandla, noma imali ukuze sikwazi ukuwahlela, isifiso sokudla esinempilo asinakuhlehliswa. Ngaphandle kwalokho, ngokwemvelo ikhishi liyabaheha abantwana. Phela, iyiphi enye indawo lapho beqeqeshwa khona ukusebenzisa imimese ngokucophelela nokuphatha ezinye izitsha? Abantwana abenamile bangenza ngisho nomonakalo ngezinye izikhathi! Nokho, yiziphi izifundo ezingatholakala ekhishini?

Ukufunda “Egumbini Lokufundela” Eliyikhishi

ULouise Smith—abafundi bakhe abaneminyaka emine ubudala abambiza ngokuthi uGingerbread Lady—waba nalesi siphetho esisekelwe kokuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe kweminyaka engu-17 efundisa abantwana abancane ukupheka: “Ukudla kuyithuluzi elihle lokufundisa ngoba kuyinto bonke abantwana abayaziyo. Izinzwa zabo zokuhogela, ukunambitha nokuthinta zibukhali kakhulu lapho besebancane kangangokuthi zibenza bahileleke ngokugcwele. Futhi ungabafundisa imisindo, izibalo namakhono okuxazulula izinkinga ngokudla.” Ukuthela, ukugqula, ukucwecwa, ukusefa, ukugoqoza nokubulunga inhlama kusiza abantwana ukuba bathuthukise amakhono okusebenzisa izandla nokusebenzelana kwamehlo nezandla. Ukukhetha (ukuhlukanisa amagilebhisi omisiwe namantongomane) nokulandelanisa (ukubeka izinkomishi zokulinganisa ngononina) kufundisa izinto ezisiza ekwakheni isisekelo sokufunda izibalo. Ukulandela indlela yokupheka kuyisivivinyo sokusebenzisa izinombolo, izilinganiso, isikhathi, ingqondo nolimi. Futhi umuntu ngeke avele angene endaweni eyinkimbinkimbi neyingozi njengekhishi ngaphandle kokufunda okuthile ngokuphepha, ukuba nomthwalo wemfanelo, ukuhleleka komuntu siqu nokusebenza njengeqembu.

Ukubaluleka kokufunda ukupheka akumelwe kudebeselelwe. Kungokuvamile ukuba abantwana abaqala ngokusiza ekhishini babe sebekwazi ukulungiselela ukudla komkhaya wonke lapho befinyelela eminyakeni eyevile eshumini nambili. Yimuphi umzali omatasa ongeke akujabulele lokho ngezikhathi ezithile? Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukupheka kusiza intsha ukuba ithuthukise ukuzethemba nokwaneliswa—izimfanelo ezingayizuzisa lapho kamuva iba abantu abadala abanemithwalo yemfanelo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi iyashada noma ihlala ingashadile.—Qhathanisa neyoku-1 Thimothewu 6:6.

ULee, owahlala engashadile kwaze kwaba yilapho eseve eminyakeni engu-30 ubudala, uyakhumbula: “Umama waqala ukungiqeqeshela imisebenzi eyisisekelo eyinsakavukela yasekhishini lapho ngineminyaka engaba yisithupha ubudala. Ekuqaleni nganginesithakazelo ngokuyinhloko ekwenzeni amakhekhe namanye amaswidi. Kodwa lapho sengineminyaka eyisishiyagalolunye ubudala, ngase ngikwazi ukuhlela nokulungisa ukudla kwawo wonke umkhaya wakithi, futhi ngangikwenza njalo. Kamuva, lapho sengimdala ngingashadile, ngaqaphela ukuthi ukukwazi ukwenza imisebenzi ehlukahlukene yasendlini, kuhlanganise nokupheka, kwakwenza ukuphila kube lula. Futhi ngingasho ngokuqinisekile ukuthi lokho kuye kwaba nengxenye ekujabuleleni kwami umshado ophumelelayo njengamanje.”

Ukupheka Kuyajabulisa!

Umzali angasithola kanjani isikhathi sokuqeqesha abantwana ekhishini? Omunye umama usikisela ukuba uhlele isikhathi lapho kungenaziphazamiso eziningi. Uma unabantwana abaningana, ungase ufune ukusebenza nomntwana ngamunye lapho besaqala. Ukuze wenze lokhu, khetha isikhathi lapho abanye abantwana besathathe isithongwana noma besesikoleni. Hlela ukuchitha isikhathi esengeziwe kunalapho upheka uwedwa. Futhi kulungele ukuba nesikhathi esijabulisayo ekhishini!

Lapho nisaqala, ungase uvumele umntanakho akhethe ukudla akuthandayo. Bheka indlela yokupheka elula futhi eveza imiphumela ngokushesha. Qiniseka ukuthi inemisebenzi angayiqeda ngokuphumelelayo. Ukuze umntanakho angayaluzi futhi abe nesithukuthezi, mcele ukuba athole izithako nezitsha ezidingekayo kusenesikhathi. Ungase ulungiselele ngisho nengxenye yezinye zezithako kusenesikhathi ukuze kungathathi isikhathi eside futhi kube nesidina.

Funda indlela yokupheka lolo hlobo lokudla nomntanakho, umbonise indlela yokwenza umsebenzi ngamunye. Nikeza umntanakho igumbi lakhe ekhishini—mhlawumbe idilowa elinezindishi nezitsha ezimbalwa—bese umnikeza iphinifa. Kunokuba unikeze umfana iphinifa labesifazane, ungase umtholele iphinifa elenzelwe umpheki wesilisa. Zisuka nje, gcizelela ukubaluleka kokuphepha bese ubeka imithetho ezwakalayo yasekhishini.—Bheka ibhokisi elithi “Isifundo Sokuqala—Ukuphepha,” ekhasini 18.

Ngaphezu kwakho konke, zama ukukwenza kujabulise. Ungamvumeli umntanakho asonge izandla nje; mtshele ageze izandla zakhe, futhi umgcine ematasa elungisa ukudla. Mnikeze ithuba lokuba ahlole izinto, afunde ngokuzisebenzisa futhi abuze imibuzo. Futhi lapho ukudla kungalungi kahle, ungakhathazeki. Uma kuphekwe umntanakho, ngokunokwenzeka uzokudla yena!

Ukuba Ndawonye Komkhaya

Ngokungangabazeki, izinzuzo ezinkulu kunazo zonke ezitholakala ekhishini zihilela ubunye nezindinganiso zomkhaya. Kungenzeka uye waqaphela ukuthi kweminye imikhaya namuhla, amalungu omkhaya amatasa azenzela izinto ngendlela abona ngayo ngaphandle kokuxhumana namanye. Ngaphansi kwezimo ezinjalo, ikhaya lingase lifane nendawo yokuphumula, indawo yokuthola amandla amasha. Ngokuphambene, umkhaya opheka ndawonye ngokunokwenzeka uyodla ndawonye futhi ugeze izitsha ndawonye. Lemisebenzi inikeza imikhaya amathuba okukhulumisana njalo, ukusebenzelana ndawonye nokuxhumana. “Ngangiba nezingxoxo ezimnandi namadodana ami lapho sigeza izitsha,” kukhumbula omunye umama. Futhi uHermann, ubaba ongumKristu, uyanezela: “Sayeka ngamabomu ukuba nomshini wokugeza izitsha iminyaka embalwa ukuze sizigeze futhi sizesule ngezandla. Amadodana ethu ayabelwe ukuzesula, ekwenza ngokushintshana. Asikho isikhathi esasidlula lesi sokukhulumisana okukhululekile.”

Yebo, isikhathi osichitha ekhishini nabantabakho—isonto ngalinye, unyaka ngamunye—sinikeza isisekelo sokuthuthukisa izindinganiso ezingokomoya nezimfanelo zokuhlonipha uNkulunkulu. Kuphakathi nalezi zikhathi zokuba ndawonye ngokukhululekile lapho ukuthululelana isifuba phakathi komzali nomntwana kungazenzakalela khona nalapho isibonelo somzali singathonya khona buthule inhliziyo yomntwana. Ukuqeqeshwa okunjalo kungazuzisa umntwana ukuphila kwakhe konke, ngoba izAga 22:6 zithi: “Khulisa umntwana ngendlela eyakuba-ngeyakhe; kuyakuthi lapho esekhulile, angasuki kuyo.”

Ngakho uma njengomzali ufuna izindlela zokuchitha isikhathi esengeziwe nabantabakho, kungani ungabaceli ukuba bakubhakise ikhekhe noma bakusize ekuphekeni ukudla komkhaya wonke? Ungase uthole ukuthi ukusebenza nabo ekhishini kuyindlela yokondla nokunakekela umkhaya wakho.

[Imibhalo yaphansi]

[Ibhokisi ekhasini 18]

Isifundo Sokuqala—Ukuphepha

Phaphamela Ukuphepha

• Ngendlela enesizotha kodwa engesabisi, chaza izingozi ezibangelwa ukusebenza ekhishini, njengoba ubungachaza izingozi ezibangelwa izimoto emgwaqweni omatasa. Yiba isibonelo esihle wena ngokwakho.

• Abantwana kufanele bagadwe umuntu omdala noma nini lapho besebenza ekhishini. Ungamvumeli umntwana asebenzise noma yiziphi izinto, ikakhulukazi zikagesi, kuze kube yilapho esekwazi ukuzisebenzisa ngokuphephile.

• Gcina ikhishi lakho licocekile. Sula okuchithekile futhi uchithe izibi ngokushesha. Izilwane ezifuywayo nezinye iziphazamiso kufanele zingabi bikho ekhishini lapho nisapheka.

Vikela Iminwe

• Imishini yokuxuba izinto zokupheka esebenza ngogesi kufanele isetshenziswe kuphela lapho kunomuntu omdala. Qiniseka ukuthi lowo mshini ucishiwe futhi wakhishwa emandleni kagesi ngaphambi kokuba umntwana afake ukhezo endishini yawo.

• Gcina imimese ibukhali, njengoba ummese obuthuntu udinga amandla futhi ngenxa yalokho ungase ushelele.

• Lapho umntanakho esafunda ukusebenzisa ummese, makalandele lezi zinyathelo: (1) makabambe ummese ngesibambo sawo, (2) abeke ummese phezu kokudla, (3) abeke esinye isandla phezu kwawo, abese (4) ewucindezela ukuze asike.

• Sebenzisa ugqoko. Ukuze izilimo eziyimifino zingalokhu zigingqika lapho umntanakho ezama ukuzisika, zisike phakathi kuqala bese uzibeka ogqokweni ngohlangothi oluyisicaba.

Gwema Ukusha

• Sicishe ngaso sonke isikhathi isitofu kanye nezinkinobho zikahhavini lapho kungasetshenziswa. Gcina amathawula, izincwadi zokupheka nezindwangu zokubamba amabhodwe ashisayo kukude nomlilo.

• Izibambo zamapani mazibe maphakathi nesitofu, lapho zingenakushayiseka kalula khona bese kuchitheka ukudla.

• Uma umntanakho epheka ngesitofu, qikelela ukuthi umi entweni eqinile futhi engagunquzi.

• Ungayithathi into eshisayo ngaphandle kokuba wazi ukuthi uzoyibekaphi. Qiniseka ukuthi abanye ekhishini bayazi ukuthi uphethe into eshisayo, ikakhulukazi uma uzodlula ngemva kwabo.