Ingculaza Nomuzwa Okhohlisayo Wokulondeka
OWESIFAZANE owatholwa enegciwane lengculaza lapho ehlolwa wabhala, njengoba kucashunwe ngenhla kuNew York Times kaJune 16, 1990: “Ngingowesifazane omhlophe oneminyaka engu-36 ubudala, ojabulayo emshadweni, ongakaze abe nogcunsula, isipatsholo noma ichlamydia, ongakaze asebenzise umlaliso okuthiwa icrack, ongakaze asebenzise umlaliso ofakwa emithanjeni ngemijovo, nongakaze ampontshelwe igazi.”
Uyenezela: “Ngenxa yokuthi angikaze ngibe nobuhlobo bobulili nomunye umuntu ngaphandle komyeni wami selokhu sashada, lokhu kusho ukuthi bengilokhu nginalo leligciwane okungenani iminyaka emihlanu ngaphandle kwezimpawu.” Ingabe lona owesifazane oyingqayizivele? Akunjalo neze, njengoba ephawula: “Ngazi okungenani abesifazane abaningi abasemaqenjini angisekelayo abanesizinda esifanayo esingokwenhlalo nesingokomnotho abanendaba efana neyami.”
Khona-ke, abantu abanjalo baye bangenwa kanjani yingculaza? Lona wesifazane uyachaza: “Ngokusobala, ngathola igciwane elikhubaza isimiso sokuzivikela komzimba ngokuhlangana ngokobulili nomuntu wobulili obehlukile [ngaphambi kokuba ngishade]. . . . Okusobala ngokufanayo, leyondoda namuhla ibingachazwa njengomngane wobulili oyingozi, kodwa kwakungacacile kimi ngalesosikhathi.”
Ngokuvamile ingculaza ibichazwa njengesifo esingena abesilisa abangongqingili kuphela kanye nabantu abasebenzisa imilaliso efakwa emithanjeni ngemilaliso. Kodwa ngokusekelwe kokuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe siqu nasekwazisweni azitholela kona, lona owesifazane ugcizelela ukuthi lombono “unikeza umphakathi wabamhlophe abasesigabeni esiphakathi sezomnotho umuzwa wokulondeka oyinkohliso.”
Uyaphetha: “Ingculaza izothi chithi saka kubo bonke abantu uma siqhubeka nokucabanga ukuthi kunamaqembu asengozini, sicabanga ngomunye ongayithola, hhayi mina. Sonke sisengozini. Uma mina ngatholakala ukuthi [nginengculaza], noma imuphi owesifazane (noma indoda) naye angaba nayo.”
Ngamanye amazwi lokho akushoyo ukuthi, noma imuphi owesifazane noma indoda ehlanganyela ebulilini ngaphambi komshado—ehlanganyela ekuhlobongeni—angangenwa yileligciwane. Khona-ke, yeka ukuthi kuhlakaniphe kanjani ukulalela iseluleko seBhayibheli: “Balekelani ubufebe. Zonke izono azenzayo umuntu zingaphandle komzimba; kepha owenza ubufebe wona owakhe umzimba.”—1 Korinte 6:18.