Ganhuro 32

Ndinogona Sei Kupfuuridzira Nyengano Inobudirira?

“KUNDIKANO zhinjisa dzeroorano ikundikano dzenyengano. Iri pfundo harigoni kunyanyowanzodzokororwa.” Akataura kudaro Paul H. Landis, munzveri pamusoro penhau youpenyu hwemhuri. Louise anogona kusimbisira kururama kwouku kutaura. Iye anotsanangura, kuti: “Mhosho yangu hurusa yakanga iri yokubatanidzwa muchidakadaka naAndy ini ndisati ndazvibvumidza ndimene kuona zvaakanga akaita somunhu. Nyengano yedu yakanga yakanyanyoganhurirwa kumigariro yavaviri bedzi. Handina kutongoona maitiro aaiita zvinhu kunze kweiyi migariro ‘inoisvofadza.’” Roorano yavo yakaputsanywa nechatanuro. Chii chiri chinhu chikurusa chokudzivisa ngwavaira yakadaro? Kupfuuridzira nyengano inobudirira!

Pamberi Pokuronga Misi Yokuvhakacha

“Murume ane mufungo [kana kuti mukadzi] anosanotarira uye anosanorangarira uko iye ari kuenda.” (Zvirevo 14:15, The Amplified Bible) Kukudziridza kunzwa kworudo nokuda kwomumwe munhu wausingatongozivi kunokoka ngwavaira—kunyange kana munhu iyeyo achiratidzika kuva anoyevedza. Kunogona kuparira roorano nomumwe munhu ane mirangariro nenharidzano zvakasiana zvikurukuru nezvako! Naizvozvo huchenjera kutanga kucherechedza munhu iyeyo pamunenge muri muboka, zvimwe pamunenge muchingunofarikanya henyu chimiro chakati kuti chenhandaro.

“Ndaiziva hangu kuti kana ndikanyanyova pedyo zvikuru pakutanga, kunzwa kwangu kwaizodzikatidza chisarudzo changu,” akatsanangura kudaro Dave, uyo zvino anofara muroorano kwamakore gumi. “Naizvozvo ndaitarisa Rose ari padaro rakati iye asingazivi kuti ndakanga ndichimufarira. Ndaigona kuona mabatire aaiita vamwe, kana kuti kana iye aiva anotamba mune zverudo. Mukukurukurawo zvako, ndakawana migariro yake nenharidzano.” Kunobetserawo kuwana ruri rudzi rwomukurumbira rwaanarwo kupfurikidza nokutaura nomumwe munhu anosanoziva munhuyo.—Enzanisa naZvirevo 31:31.

Kuronga Misi Yokuvhakacha Kwokutanga

Wasarudza kuti mumwe munhu angava mukwanyina wakakodzera weroorano nokuda kwako, ungasvika munhuyo ndokuratidzira chishuvo chokuda kuziva munhu iyeyo zviri nani zvikuru.a Uchirangarira kuti pane davidzo yokubvuma, kuronga musi wokuvhakacha kwako kwokutanga hakuzati kuchidikanirwa kuva chinoitika chakati kuti chamaoresa. Zvimwe kuronga musi wokuvhakacha nokuda kwezvokudya kana kuti kunyange kuva rutivi rwokuronga musi wokuvhakacha kweboka kuchakugonesa kuva anorovedzana zviri nani zvikuru kuti ugosarudza kana iwe uchida kutongopfuuridzirazve ukamahwo. Kuita kuti zvinhu zvirambe zvichinge zviri zvomuitiro kunobetsera kupedza rwakati kuti rworutyo rwamunganzwa pakutanga mose muri vaviri. Uye kupfurikidza nokudzivisa kutaura kwapamberi penguva kwokuzvipa, munogona kuderedza kunzwa kwokurambwa—kana kuti kangaidziko—kana mumwe wenyu akarashikirwa nefariro.

Pasinei hapo norudzi rwokuronga musi wokuvhakacha rwunorongedzerwa, svika nenguva, wakapfeka nomutoo wakatsvinda uye nomutoo wakakodzera. Ratidzira unyanzvi hwenyanzvi yokukurukura yakanaka. Iva muteereri anoshingaira. (Jakobho 1:19) Kunyange zvazvo pasina mirau yorumano munhau dzakadaro, jaya richada kutevera chinorangarirwa munzvimbomo kuva tsika dzakanaka. Idzodzi dzingabatanidza kuzarurira suo mhandara duku kana kuti kumubetsera kugara pachigaro. Mhandara, isati ichingunorangarira kuva inobatwa somuzvare, inofanira kubatira pamwe chete nomutoo wokuzvininipisa nenhamburiko dzomukomana wayo. Kupfurikidza nokubatana noruremekedzano, vaviri vanogona kugadza muenzaniso nokuda kwenguva yemberi. Murume anorairwa ku‘kudza mudzimai wake somudziyo usine simba zvikuru.’ Uye mudzimai kuva “noruremekedzo rukuru nokuda kwomurume wake.”—1 Petro 3:7; VaEfeso 5:33.

Ko kubatana maoko, kutsvodana, kana kuti kumbundirana kwakakodzera here, uye kana kwakadaro, rini? Ratidzirwo dzechidakadaka, padzinoitwa sezviratidziro chaizvoizvo zvokudanana uye kwete ruchiva rwevatano rwoudyire, dzinogona kuva dzose dziri mbiri dzakachena nedzakakodzera. Bhuku reBhaibheri roRwiyo rwaSoromoni rinoratidzira kuti ratidzirwo dzakakodzera dzokudanana dzakanga dzatsinhaniswa pakati pomusikana wechiShuramiti nomukomana mufudzi waaida uye waaizoroorwa naye nokukurumidza. (Rwiyo rwaSoromoni 1:2; 2:6; 8:5) Asi sokuna vaviri ivavo vakachena, vaviri vangada kungwarirazve kuti ratidzirwo dzechidakadaka hadzisati dzichiva dzisina kuchena kana dzinoparira utere hwevatano.b (VaGaratia 5:19, 21) Nenzira ine mufungo, ratidziro dzakadaro dzokudanana dzinofanira kuitwa bedzi apo vimbisano inenge yaitwa uye roorano yoratidzika kuva yava pedyo. Kupfurikidza nokuratidzira kuzvidzora, munogona kudziviswa kuva vanobviswa pavavariro huru yenyengano inobudirira, ndiko kuti . . .

Kuziva “Munhu Akavandika Womwoyo”

Chikwata chokunzvera chakashuma muchinyorwa chaMay 1980 cheJournal of Marriage and the Family, kuti: “Sezvinobvira zvikuru roorano dzinoratidzika kuva dzinogara uye dzinobudirira kana vanhu vachipinda madziri nezivo izere ine mwero yomwoyo womumwe nomumwe.” Hungu, kuziva “munhu akavandika womwoyo” weshamwari yako kuri madikanwa.—1 Petro 3:4.

Asika, ‘kubudisa’ vavariro dzomwoyo womumwe kunoda nhamburiko necherechedzo. (Zvirevo 20:5) Naizvozvo rongedzera mibato ine bviro huru yokukubetsera kuona mwoyo umene weshamwari yako. Nepo kuenda kubhaisikopo kana kuti kukonzati kungava kwakaringanira pakutanga, kubatikana mumibato inozvipa iyo imene zviri nani zvikuru kukukurukurirana (yakadai semutserendende, bowling, uye kushanyira nzvimbo dzinochengeterwa mhuka, mamiyuziamu, nzvimbo dzinochengeterwa mifananidzo inovezwa nounyanzvi) kunogona kuita zvakawanda kukubetserai kuva vanorovedza zviri nani zvikuru.

Kuwana rumbonera rwokunzwa kweshamwari yako, edza kushandisa mibvunzo yakajeka, yakadai sokuti, ‘Unoshandisa sei nguva yako yakasununguka?’ ‘Kudai mari isati yaiva chinetso, waizoda kuitei?’ ‘Rutivii rwokunamata kwedu Mwari rwaunoda zvikurusa? Neiko?’ Iyoyi inobvumira davidzo dzomwoyo dzinokubetsera kuziva izvo shamwari yako inokoshesa.

Sezvo ukama hunokura uye imi vaviri muchirangarira zvakakomba roorano, pane dikanwo yokutaura kwakakomba pamusoro penhau dzinokosha dzakadai semipimo yenyu; pamuchagara uye sei; nhau dzezvemari, dzichibatanidza kana imi mose muri vaviri muchizoshanda kunze kwomusha; vana; kudzora kubereka; mifungo yebasa romumwe nomumwe muroorano; uye dzose dziri mbiri nharidzano dzazvino nedzenguva yemberi namarongedzerere amunoita kusvika idzodzi. Zvapupu zviduku zvizhinji zvaJehovha zvinova vaevhangeri venguva yakazara pashure pokupedza chikoro uye zvinoshuva kupfuurira kubatira nenzira iyeyo pashure peroorano. Zvino ndiyo nguva yokuti imi vaviri muve nechokwadi chokuti nharidzano dzenyu dzomudzimu dzinowirirana. Ndiyowo nguva yokuwadzanyura zvinhu, zvichida zvomunguva yenyu yakapfuura, zvingatapura roorano. Izvozvi zvingabatanidza ngava dzipi nedzipi huru kana kuti misengwa. Nhau dzoutano, dzakadai sehosha ipi neipi yakakomba, uye miuyo yazvo inofanirawo kukurukurwa nomutoo wakajeka.

Mukurukurirano dzakadaro, teverai muenzaniso waErihu, uyo akati: “Ini ndinotaura zvakananga zvinobva mumwoyo wangu uye ndinotaura nomutoo wapachokwadi.” (Jobho 33:3, The Holy Bible in the Language of Today, rakanyorwa naWilliam Beck) Mukurondedzera kuti nyengano yake yakamugadzirira sei nokuda kweyakabvumikisa kuva roorano inofadza, Esther akati: “Ini handina kutongoedza kuva ‘bata kumeso’ kana kuti kutaura kuti ndinobvumirana naJaye apo ini ndainzwa nomutoo wakasiana. Nazvino handidaro naye. Nguva dzose ndinoedza kuva akatendeseka.”

Rega kunzvenga kana kuti kuvanza nhau dzinotapura nokuda kwokutya kugumbura shamwari yako pakarepo. Beth akaita iyi mhosho mukati menyengano yake naJohn. Beth akataura kuti iye aidavira mukuchengeta mari nokuda kwenguva yemberi uye kusapambadza mari. John akataura kuti iye akabvumira. Beth haana kuzobvunzisisazve, achifunga hake kuti ivo vakasanobvumirana pamusoro penhau dzezvamari. Asi kwakaitika kuti pfungwa yaJohn yokuchengeta mari nokuda kwenguva yemberi kwakareva kuchengeta mari nokuda kwemotokari itsva yamasipotsi! Pashure peroorano kushaiwa kwavo bvumirano pamusoro pokuti vangashandisa sei mari kwakaoneka nomutoo unorwadza.

Kusabvumirana kwakadaro kunogona kudziviswa. Louise, adudzwa pakutanga-tanga, anotaura muyeukwo yenyengano yake, achiti: “Ini ndaifanira kuve ndakabvunza mimwe mibvunzo yakawanda, yakadai sokuti, ‘Zvakadiniko kana ini ndikanamba mimba uye usati waida kuti uve nomwana, waizoita sei?’ Kana kuti, ‘Kudai taiva nechikwereti uye ini ndaida kugara pamba ndichitarisira mwana wedu, waizotarisira sei nhau dzacho?’ Ndaizodai ndakasanocherechedza kuita kwake.” Kurukurirano dzakadaro dzinogona kubudisa pamhene mavara omwoyo anofanira kusanoonwa zvikuru pamberi peroorano.

Muone Achiita Zvinhu!

“Munhu anogona kuva akanaka zvikuru kwauri pamunenge muri vaviri chete,” anotsanangura kudaro Esther. “Asi apo vamwe vanenge varipo, vanowanzoiswa mumugariro usingakarirwi. Imwe yeshamwari dzako ingataura chimwe chinhu kushamwari yako icho iye angasada. Ipapo unoona maitiro aanoita mukudzvinyirirwa. Ko iye achatuka munhuyo here kana kuti achava anovirima?” Iye anogumisa, achiti: “Kuva pane shamwari dzomumwe nomumwe uye mhuri mukati menyengano yedu kwakabetsera zvikurusa.”

Mukuwedzera kunhandaro, pedzai nguva muchishanda pamwe chete. Goveranai mumabasa echiKristu, kubatanidza nefundo yeShoko raMwari nomuushumiri hwechiKristu. Uyewo, batikanai pamamwe mabasa ezuva nezuva ayo pashure peroorano achava mutoo woupenyu—kutenga zvokudya, kugadzirira zvokudya, kusuka ndiro, nokuchenesa imba. Kupfurikidza nokuva pamwe chete mumigariro chaiyoiyo—apo shamwari yako ingatove iri pamugariro wayo wakaipisisa—iwe unogona kuona seri kwenyengedzo ipi neipi.

Mufudzi woRwiyo rwaSoromoni akaona maitiro aiita musikana wake apo iye aiodzwa mwoyo kana kuti apo iye akanga achishanda muzuva rinopisa—adikitira uye aneta. (Rwiyo rwaSoromoni 1:5, 6; 2:15) Pashure pokunge aonawo madzivisire aakaita mukuvimbika nyengedzo dzaMambo akapfuma Soromoni, iye akakuwa, achiti: “Wakaisvonaka chose, Haiwa shamwarisikana yangu, uye mauri hamuna hurema.” (Rwiyo rwaSoromoni 4:7) Zvamazvirokwazvo iye haana kureva kuti akanga akakwana, asi kuti akanga asina hurema hukuru hwetsika kana kuti vanga. Rutsvindo rwake rwokunyama rwakanga ruchivandudzwa nesimba rake retsika, raikurira hutera hupi nohupi paari.—Enzanisa naJobho 31:7.

Kuita chisarudzo chakadaro kunoda nguva. Naizvozvo dzivisa nyengano yechimbi-chimbi. (Zvirevo 21:5) Kazhinji kazhinji murume nomukadzi vangaedza nhamburiko iri yose kuwana rudo rwomumwe nomumwe. Asi kana vakapiwa nguva yakaringanira, miitiro isingafadzi netsika zvine mutoo wokuzvizivisa zvimene. Vaviri vasati vachingova bedzi nenguva asi vanoita shandiswo yakanakisisa yayo mukati menyengano sezvinobvira vachawana gadziridzo iri nyore zvikuru pashure peroorano. Nameso akasvinura, vangagona kupinda muroorano vachivimba nezvokuva vanokwanisa kupedza kusabvumirana kuchamuka. Nyengano inobudirira yakavagadzirira nokuda kweroorano inobudirira neinofadza.

[Mashoko Omuzasi]

Mibvunzo Yekurukurirano

◻ Chii chiri vavariro yokutanga yenyengano, uye inokosha sei kumufarwa weroorano?

◻ Chii chichakubetsera kuziva ‘mwoyo umene’ womumwe?

◻ Rudzii rwekurukurirano runobetsera kunyengano inobudirira?

◻ Neiko kupedzera nguva pamwe chete mumhatsa yemigariro kuchibetsera?

◻ Ndezvipi zviri zvimwe zviratidziro zvokuti ukama hune mhaka?

◻ Ndirini apo nyengano inofanira kuregwa?

[Mashoko okukwezva vaverengi ari papeji 255]

“Sezvinobvira zvikuru roorano dzinoratidzika kuva dzinogara uye dzinobudirira kana vanhu vachipinda madziri nezivo izere ine mwero yomwoyo womumwe nomumwe.”—Journal of Marriage and the Family

[Bhokisi/Mufananidzo uri papeji 256]

Tinofanira Kuparadzana Here?

Rudo zvarunosvika pamharadzano yokuitwa kwechisarudzo, hakuzati kuri kwechienzi kuti panikiro dzinomuka. Zvakadiniko kana panikiro dzakadaro dzichibva muzvikanganiso zvakakomba zvomunhu wauri kudanana naye kana muukama ihwo humene?

Somuenzaniso, ndokwechokwadi kuti kunyange vanhu vanodanana vanogona kusabvumirana padzimwe nguva. (Enzanisa naGenesi 30:2; Mabasa 15:39.) Asika kana musingabvumirani panenge pamusoro pechinhu chiri chose zvacho, kana kurukurirano iri yose ichiguma nepopotedzano, kana kuti kana ukama hwenyu huri denderedzwa risingatongogumi rokuparadzana nokudzokerana, munangwarira! Nzvero yavanachiremba vane 400 yakawadzanyura kuti kupopotedzana kunopfuurira chiratidzo chakasimba cho“kusava vakagadzirira mumurangariro nokuda kweroorano,” zvimwe kunyange kuratidzira “rwisano isingaenzanisirwi pakati pavanyakuroorana.”

Chimwe chisakiso chokuitira hanya chingava kuwana kwako zvikanganiso zvinokangaidza zvohunhu mumukwanyina anokarirwa. Ratidzirwo yechimiro chendangariro chamasimba masimba kana kunyange zviratidzo zvoudyire, kusakura mumudzimu, chimiro chendangariro chinochinja-chinja, kana kuti chisimbwa chingakuita kuti uzvibvunze kana uchida kupedza nguva yose youpenyu hwako une uyu munhu. Asika vazhinji vanofuratira kana kuti vanoedza kururamisa zvikanganiso zvakadaro ndokuratidzika kuva vanotsunga kuita kuti ukama hubudirire kunyange kana zvoita sei. Neiko ikoku kuchidaro?

Sezvo nyengano ichirangarirwa nomutoo wakakomba pakati pamaKristu echokwadi—sezvainofanira kudaro—vamwe vanonzwa vachidzvinyirirwa kuroora mumwe munhu wavanodanana naye. Ivo vangavawo vanotya kunangana kana zvimwe kukuvadza uyu munhu. Vamwe vangangotya havo bedzi kuti havazati vachizowana mumwe munhu wokuroorana naye. Kunyanguvezvo, izvozvi hazvisati zviri zvikonzero zvakanaka zvokupfuuridzira nyengano yakazadzwa nezvinetso.

Donzo renyengano nderokufeya-feya bviro yeroorano. Uye kana muKristu akatanga nyengano mukutenda kwakanaka, iye haana musengwa wokuipfuuridzira kana ikabvumikisa kuva ine mhaka. Kunze kwezvo, hakuzati kwaizova kusina kururama here uye kune udyire kupfuudzira ukama huri kushata pamusoro pechikonzero chokuti, ‘zvimwe ini handizati ndichizowana mumwe?’ (Enzanisa naVaFiripi 2:4.) Nokudaro kunokosha kuti munangane—kwete kunzvenga—nezvinetso zvenyu savaviri. Vamba nokunzvera kwakakomba munhu wauri kuronga naye misi yokuvhakacha.

Somuenzaniso, pane ufakazi here hwokuti uyu ndiye mukadzi achava anozviisa pasi, mudzimai anokwanisa? (Zvirevo 31:10-31) Pane ufakazi here hwokuti uyu ndiye murume acharatidzira rudo rwokuzvibayira achiva muriritiri anokwanisa? (VaEfeso 5:28, 29; 1 Timotio 5:8) Munhu angataura kuva mubatiri anoshingaira waMwari, asi pane mabasa here okutsigira kutaura kwakadaro kwokutenda?—Jakobho 2:17, 18.

Chokwadi, kana wakashandisa nguva yakawanda nomurangariro mukukudzidzira ukama, rega kukurumidza kugura nemhaka bedzi yokuti wakawana kuti haana kukwana. (Jakobho 3:2) Zvichida zvikanganiso zvomunhuyo ndezviya zvaunogona kurarama nazvo.

Zvakadiniko kana zvisati? Kurukurai pamusoro penhaudzo. Ko mune kusawirirana kukuru munharidzano here kana mirangariro? Kana kuti panguve here bedzi pane kusawirirana? Ingava here nhau yokuti imi mose muri vaviri munoda kudzidza mutoo woku‘dzora mudzimu wenyu’ ndokugadzikisa nhau nomutoo wakaterama? (Zvirevo 25:28) Kana miitiro inonetsa yohunhu ichikunetsa, ko iye anobvuma nokuzvininipisa zvikanganiso ndokuratidzira chishuvo chokuvandudza here? Pane dikanwo here kwauri yokudzivisa kusatana kushatirwa, kusatana kutapurika? (Muparidzi 7:9) ‘Kuregererana murudo’ ndihwo upenyu hweroorano yakanaka.—VaEfeso 4:2.

Panzvimbo pokuparadza ukama hwenyu, kutaura nhau ipapo kungasanowadzanyura bviro yahunayo nokuda kwokukura kwomunguva yemberi! Asi kana kurukurirano yacho ikangoparira bedzi kumwe kuparadzana kunokangaidza, musafuratira zviratidzo zviri pamhene zvengwavaira yosvika. (Zvirevo 22:3) Sezvinobvira zvinhu hazvizati zvichizovandudzika pashure peroorano. Kurega nyengano kungava fariro dzenyu dzakanakisisa imi mose muri vaviri.

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 253]

Kuonana muboka kunogona kukubvumirai kuva vanorovedzana pasina kudanana

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 254]

Kuteerera mirairo yomuzvimbomo yetsika nokuzvibata kwakanaka kunogadza muenzaniso wokuremekedzana unogona kupfuurira kupinda muroorano

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 259]

Apo kunova kunooneka kuti nyengano haizati iri kubudirira, chinhu chomutsa chokuita ndechokuva nekurukurirano makanangana, muchitsanangura chikonzero nei ukama huchifanira kuguma