Ganhuro 5
Ndinogona Sei Kubata Nokuroorazve Kwomubereki Wangu?
Shane anoyeuka kuti: “Zuva rakaroora Baba vangu Rita rakanga riri zuva rakaipisisa roupenyu hwangu. Ndakapenga. Ndakapengera Baba nokuda kwokuva munyengeri kuna Amai vangu. Ndakapengera Amai nokuda kwokuenda kuchikoro chomutemo vachitisiya havo tiri toga. Ndakapengera tupwere tuviri, twana twaRita, twakanga tuchiuya kuzogara mumba medu . . . Asi kupfuura zvose, ndakapengera Rita . . . Ndakamuvenga. Uye nemhaka yokuti ndaidavira kuti kwakanga kusina kururama kuvenga, ndakazvipengerawo ini ndimene.”—Stepfamilies—New Patterns in Harmony, rakanyorwa naLinda Craven.
KUROORAZVE kwomubereki kunoparadza tariro yokuti vabereki vako vachazombodzokeranazve pamwe chete. Kunogona kukuita kuti unzwe usakakotsekana, wakanyengerwa, uye une godo.
Kuroorazve kunogona kuva kunokuvadza zvikurukuru kana kukaitika pashure chaipo porufu rwomubereki anodikanwa. Missy wezera ramakore 16 anobvuma, kuti: “Rufu rwaamai vangu rwakaita kuti ndishatirwe zvikuru. Ndakafunga kuti shamwarisikana yababa vangu yakanga ichitsiva amai vangu naizvozvo ndakanga ndine utsinye zvikuru kwairi.” Uchivimba nomubereki wako chaiye, ungatonzwa une mhaka kana ukavamba kuda mubereki nokuna baba.
Hakuzatiwo kuchishamisa, ipapoka, kuti pwere zhinji dzinoratidzira kurwadziwa kwadzo kwenhunha munzira dzinoparadza. Dzimwe dzinotoronga kuputsa roorano itsva yomubereki wadzo. Asika yeuka, mubereki wako chaiye nomubereki nokuna baba vakatsinhana mhiko pamberi paMwari. “Naizvozvo, ngaparege kuva nomunhu [kana kuti mwana] anoparadzanisa icho Mwari akabatanidza pamwe chete.” (Mateo 19:6) Uye kunyange kana ukavaparadzanisa, ikoku hakuzati kwaizobatanidzazve vabereki vako chaivo.
Uyewo hakuzati kuchitongoita mufungo kuva anopfuurira kurwisana nomubereki nokuna baba. Zvirevo 11:29 inonyevera, kuti: “Iye unoparira nhamo mhuri yokwake uchagara nhaka yemhepo bedzi,” ndiko kuti, kuguma nokusava nechinhu. (New International Version) Kuitira pfunde-pfunde kwaGerri wezera ramakore ane gumi namashanu amai nokuna baba pakupedzisira kwakaguma nokurwa kwakakomba. Chii chakava muuyo wacho? Amai vake nokuna baba vakaraira kuti baba vaGerri vasarudze pakati pavo nomwanasikana wavo. Gerri akaguma nokudzokera kuna amai vake chaivo—avo vakanga varoorwazve.
Rudo Runokubetsera Kugonana Nakwo
Chii chiri chakavanzika chokugonana murubudiriro nokuroorazve kwomubereki? Kushandisa rudo rune nheyo sorunorondedzerwa pana 1 VaKorinte 13:4-8:
Rudo “harutsvaki fariro dzarwo rumene.” Ikoku kunoreva ‘kusatsvaka chimuko chedu timene, asi checho chomumwe munhu.’ (1 VaKorinte 10:24) Kana mubereki asarudza kuti iye anodazve ushamwaridzani hwomukwanyina weroorano, unofanira kushatirirwa ikoku here?
“Rudo harune godo.” Kazhinji kazhinji pwere hadzisati dzichida kugoverana rudo rwomubereki wadzo chaiyeiye nomunhu upi noupiwo zvake. Asi haudikanirwi kutya kuti mubereki wako uchapererwa norudo, sezvo rudo ruchigona kufutunuka. (Enzanisa na 2 VaKorinte 6:11-13.) Mubereki wako chaiye anogona kufutunura rudo rwake kubatanidza mukwanyina mutsva pasina kurashikirwa nechidakadaka chipi nechipi nokuda kwako! Uchazarura mwoyo wako kubatanidza mubereki nokuna baba here? Kuita kudaro hakuzati kuchitongoreva kuti iwe hauvimbiki kuno mubereki wako akaenda.
Rudo “haruzvibati nomutoo usina kufanira.” Kurarama nehanzvadzi itsva kana kuti vakoma vomutezo wakasiana kunogona kuparira dzvinyiriro dzokuzvibata. Sezvinoshumwa, vatano yakaipa inoitika pakati pemitezo yemhuri mu 25 muzana yemhuri dzomubvandiripo.
Anodaro David, uyo ane kuroorazve kwaamai vake kwakaunza hanzvadzi dzomubvandiripo dzechiduku ina mumba, “Kwakanga kuri madikanwa kuisa chidziviso chesimbi pakureva nezvekunzwa kwevatano.” Uchadawo kuva anongwarira kudzivisa kujairana kusina kufanira, uchiva nechokwadi chokuti kupfeka kwako kana kuti kuzvibata kwako hakuzati kuchinyandura vatano.—VaKorose 3:5.
Rudo “runotsungirira pachinhu chipi nechipi . . . Runotipa simba rokutsungirira muchinhu chipi nechipi.” (Shanduro yaCharles B. Williams) Padzimwe nguva hapana chinhu chinoratidzika kuva chinoita kuti kunzwa kwako kwokurwadziwa kubve! Marla akabvuma, kuti: “Ndainzwa kuti ndakanga ndisina nzvimbo mumushamo. Ndakatoudza amai vangu kuti ndaitoshuva kuti dai ndakanga ndisina hangu kutongoberekwa.” Marla akapanduka uye akatotiza! Zvisinei, zvino iye anoti: “Chinhu chakanakisisa ndechokutsungirira.” Kana iwe nenzira imwe cheteyo ukatsungirira, munguva yakafanira ukasharari, kuremedzwa, nokurwadziwa kwawainzwa pakutanga zvichaderera.
‘Imi Hamuzati Muri Amai Vangu Chaivoivo/Baba!’
Kuva pasi pechirango chomubereki mutsva hakuzi nyore, uye pakukumbirwa kuita chimwe chinhu nomubereki nokuna baba, kungava kunoedza kuti ubvotomoke, uchiti, ‘Imi hamuzati muri amai vangu chaivoivo/baba!’ Asi yeuka nheyo inorondedzerwa pana 1 VaKorinte 14:20, kuti: “Kura mukufunga kwako.”—The Holy Bible in the Language of Today, rakanyorwa naWilliam Beck.
Kugamuchira chiremera chomubereki nokuna baba chokukuranga ndeimwe nzira yokuratidzira kuti iwe ‘wakura mukufunga kwako.’ Iye anoita misengwa yomubereki chaiye uye anofanirwa noruremekedzo rwako. (Zvirevo 1:8; VaEfeso 6:1-4) Munguva dzeBhaibheri Estere akarerwa nababa vokurera, kana “mutarisiri” apo vabereki vake vakafa. Kunyange zvazvo iye akanga asiri baba vake chaivo, Mordekai aka‘isa mirairo paari,’ iyo iye akateerera kunyange somukuru! (Estere 2:7, 15, 17, 20) Zvomenemene, chirango chomubereki nokuna baba chinowanzova ratidzirwo yorudo nokuitira hanya nokuda kwako.—Zvirevo 13:24.
Zvakare, zvinyunyuto zvine mufungo zvinosungirwa kuitika. Kana zvikadaro, zvibvumikise iwe umene kuva ‘akura’ kupfurikidza nokuita seizvo VaKorose 3:13 inokurudzira, kuti: “Rambai muchiregererana nokukanganwirana norusununguko kana munhu upi noupi ane chisakiso chokugurukutira mumwe.”
Dzidza Kugoverana, Dzidza Kutera
Apo Jamie wezera ramakore 15 aigara oga bedzi naamai vake, akanga ane kamuri rake oga uye aipfeka zvipfeko zvinodya mari yakawanda. Apo amai vake vakaroorwazve uye Jamie akazviwana amene ari mumhuri ina vana vana, zvinhu zvakachinja. Iye akachema, achiti: “Zvino handichisinazve kamuri rangu ndoga. Ndinotofanira kugoverana chinhu chiri chose.”
Ungatofanirawo kurega nzvimbo yako somwana wedangwe kana kuti mwana bedzi. Kana uri mwanakomana, kwenguva refu ungave wakabatira somurume wemba—nzvimbo zvino yava nababa vako nokuna amai. Kana kuti kana uri mwanasikana, kungava kwokuti iwe naamai vako manga makaita somukoma nomunin’ina, kunyange kurara mukamuri rimwe chetero, asi zvino iwe wakabviswa nababa vako nokuna amai.
“Kuva kwako nomufungo ngakuzivikanwe kuvanhu vose,” rinorumbidza kudaro Bhaibheri. (VaFiripi 4:5) Shoko rapakuvamba rakashandiswa rakareva “kutera” uye rakaratidzira mudzimu wouyo asina kuomerera pamaruramiro apamutemo ake ose. Naizvozvo, edza kuva anotera, anobvumirana. Shandisa zvakanakisisa zvikuru nzvimbo yako itsva, uye dzivisa kufungisisa pane zvomunguva yakapfuura. (Muparidzi 7:10) Iva anodisisa kugoverana nevanin’ina nokuna amai uye hanzvadzi nokuna amai, usati uchivabata savokunze. (1 Timotio 6:18) Kana mukakurumidza zvikuru kuvamba kurangarirana sehanzvadzi chaidzo navakoma navanin’ina chaivo, kunzwa kwenyu nokuda kwomumwe nomumwe kuchakurumidza kukura zvikuru. Uye kana ari murume mutsva wemba, usamushatirirwa. Fara kuti iye aripo kuti abetsere kutakura mutwaro wemitoro yemba.
Kugonana Nokubatwa Kusina Kuenzana
Pashure pokubvuma kuti baba vake nokuna amai vanoratidzira rudo, mumwe musikana muduku anowedzera, kuti: “Asi pano musiano. Ivo vanokarira zvakawanda, vanoranga zvikuru, vanotinzwisisa zvishoma . . . kupinda zvavanoita vana vavo vamene vezera rimwe chetero. Urwu rutivi runorwadza kwatiri.”
Ziva kuti baba nokuna amai vachawanzosarangarira nenzira imwe cheteyo mubvandiripo sezvavanoita kuna iye ari wavo chaiye. Ikoku kuri nokuda, kwechisati zvikurusa chiri chisungo cheropa nomwana wavo chaiye, asi chinoitika chavo chakagoveranwa mukurarama nomwana wavo chaiye. Kunze kwezvo, kunyange mubereki anoukama hwokuropa angada mumwe mwana kupinda mumwe. (Genesi 37:3) Zvisinei, pano mutsaukano unokosha pakati pokuenzana nokusasarudza. Vanhu vano hunhu hwomunhu oga nezvinodikanwa zvakasiana. Naizvozvo panzvimbo pokunyanyoitira hanya kana iwe uri kubatwa zvakaenzana, edza kuona kana baba vako nokuna amai vari kutamburira kusvitsa zvinodikanwa zvako. Kana uchirangarira kuti izvozvi hazvisi kusvitswa, ipapoka une chikonzero chokukurukura nhau yacho kuna baba vako nokuna amai.
Hanzvadzikomana dzako kana kuti hanzvadzisikana nokuna amai dzinogonawo kuva manyuko ekakavadzano. Usatongokanganwa kuti idzowo dzingava dzichiva nenguva yakaoma mukuchinjira kumugariro wemhuri nokuna baba. Zvimwe dzingatokushatirirwa somupindiri mumhuri yadzo. Naizvozvo edza hunani hwako kuva ane mutsa. Kana dzikakuvirimira, edza ‘kukurira chakashata nechakanaka.’ (VaRoma 12:21) Kunze kwezvo, hakuzati kuri kwechienzi kunyange kuhanzvadzikomana nehanzvadzisikana dzokuropa kubonderana panguva nenguva.—Ona Ganhuro 6.
Rushiviriro Runobetsera!
“Mugumo wenhau pashure uri nani zvikuru kupinda mavambo ayo. Uyo anoshivirira ari nani zvikuru kupinda uyo anozvikudza mumudzimu.” (Muparidzi 7:8) Kazhinji kazhinji, makore anoverengeka anodikanwa chivimbo chisati chakura kusvikira pamwero uwo mitezo yemhuri nokuna baba inonzwa yakasununguka kuno mumwe nomumwe. Panguva iyoyo bedzi miitiro uye mipimo yakasiana ingabatana mumuitiro unoshanda. Naizvozvo iva anoshivirira! Usakarira kuwana “rudo rwapakarepo” kana kuti “mhuri yapakarepo” ichava muuyo.
Apo amai vaThomas vakaroorwazve, iye akanga asina kusununguka, kutaura hedu zvishoma. Amai vake vakanga vane vana vana, uye murume wavakaroorwa naye akanga ana vatatu. “Tairwa, taiitirana nharo, tainyongana, taiva nenhamo dzakaipa dzendangariro,” akanyora kudaro Thomas. Chii chakaparira rubudiriro rwokupedzisira? “Kupfurikidza nokushandisa nheyo dzeBhaibheri, zvinhu zvakagadzikiswa; nguva dzose kwete pakarepo, asi kupfurikidza nenguva nokushandiswa kwezvibereko zvomudzimu waMwari, migariro pakupedzisira yakaterama.”—VaGaratia 5:22, 23.
Kuti kuomerera kunheyo dzeBhaibheri kunoparira chaizvoizvo rubudiriro mumhuri yomubvandiripo kunoenzanisirwa nezvinoitika zvinotevera zvepwere dzatakabvunzurudza:
Pwere Dzomumhuri Yomubvandiripo Dzinobudirira
Mubvunzurudzi: Ko iwe wakadzivisa sei kushatirirwa chirango chababa vako nokuna amai?
Lynch: Amai vangu nababa nokuna amai nguva dzose vaibatira pamwe pamusoro pechirango. Apo chimwe chinhu chaiitika, vose vari vaviri vaisvika pachisarudzo chokuchiita, naizvozvo apo ini ndairohwa, ndaiziva kuti chaibva kuna vose vari vaviri.
Linda: Pakutanga kwakanga kwakaoma zvikuru nokuti ndaizoti, “Ko imi mune maruramiro eyi okundiudza izvozvi?” Asi ipapo ini ndakafunga nezvekutaura kunoita Bhaibheri kuti ‘Kudza amai vako nababa vako.’ Kunyange zvazvo ivo vakanga vasati vari baba vangu chaivo, mukuona kwaMwari ivo vakanga variwo baba vangu.
Robin: Ndaiziva hangu kuti kwaizokuvadza zvikuru amai vangu kuti ndishatirirwe munhu wavaida.
Mubvunzurudzi: Chii Chakasimudzira Kurukurirano Yakanaka?
Lynch: Unotofanira kufarira icho baba vako nokuna amai vanoita. Ndaivabetsera kubasa ravo rokunyika. Uye sezvataishanda hedu taizotaura ndokutaura. Ikoku kwakandibetsera kuona mafungire avaiita. Dzimwe nguva ndaingogara zvangu bedzi navo, uye taizotaura hedu pamusoro pe‘chinhu chisingakoshi.’
Valerie: Amai vangu nokuna baba neni taipedza nguva yakawanda pamwe chete, uye ini ndakasvika zvomenemene pakuvanzwisisa. Takava shamwari dzapedyosa.
Robin: Baba vangu vakafa gore rimwe bedzi pamberi pokuroorwazve kwaAmai. Ini ndakaramba kuswedera pedyo nababa nokuna amai nokuti ndakanga ndisingavadi kutsiva baba vangu. Ndakanyengetera kuti Mwari agondibetsera kukanganwa rufu rwababa vangu ndokuswedera pedyo nababa vangu nokuna amai. Ndakanyengetera, ndakanyengetera uye ndokunyengetera. Jehovha akapindura zvomenemene iyi minyengetero.
Mubvunzurudzi: Chii chawakaita kuti uswedere pedyo zvikuru?
Valerie: Padzimwe nguva ini ndaizokumbira amai vangu nokuna baba kuti vaende neni kubhaisikopo—isu tiri vaviri bedzi. Kana apo ndaisavapo, ndaizovatengera maruva kana chirongo chamaruva, chimwe chinhu chokuvaratidzira kuti ndakanga ndichifunga pamusoro pavo. Ivo vaionga zvomenemene ikoku.
Eric: Unotofanira kutsvaka chimwe chinhu chamunofarikanya imi mose muri vaviri. Chinhu chakafanana bedzi chataiwirirana nababa vangu nokuna amai chakanga chiri chokuti ivo vakanga vakaroora amai vangu uye taigara muimba imwe chete. Betsero hurusa yakavapo apo ini ndakava nefariro imwe cheteyo muBhaibheri iyo vakanga vanayo. Zvandakaswedera pedyo zvikuru naJehovha Mwari, ndakava pedyo zvikurusa nababa vangu nokuna amai. Zvino isu zvomenemene takanga tava nechinhu chimwe chetecho chakafanana!
Mubvunzurudzi: Ko iwe pachako wakabetserekana sei?
Robin: Apo ini ndaigara naamai vangu bedzi, ndaipandukira uye ndakashatswa. Ndaigaroda kuita zvinhu nenzira yangu. Zvino ndakadzidza kurangarira vamwe nokuva asina udyire zvikuru.
Lynch: Baba vangu nokuna amai vakandibetsera kufunga somurume. Ivo vakandibetsera kuwana unyanzvi ndokuziva mashandisirwe amaoko angu. Apo nguva dzakanga dzakaoma uye ini ndaida mumwe munhu, ivo vaivapo. Hungu, ivo ndibaba vakanakisisa avo munhu upi noupi ati ambova navo.
Mibvunzo Yekurukurirano
◻ Ko pwere zhinji dzinonzwa sei apo vabereki vadzo vanoroorazve? Neiko?
◻ Ko kuratidzira rudo rwechiKristu kunobetsera sei pwere kukurira?
◻ Ko unotofanira kuzviisa pasi pechirango chomubereki nokuna amai here?
◻ Neiko kuchikosha kuziva mutoo wokutera nawo nokugoverana nawo?
◻ Unofanira kukarira kubatwa kwakaenzana nehanzvadzi nokuna baba navanin’ina nokuna baba here? Zvakadiniko kana iwe uchinzwa kuti iwe uri kubatwa zvisina kufanira?
◻ Ndezvipi zvimwe zvinhu zvaunogona kuita zvichakubetsera kuwirirana zviri nani zvikuru nomubereki nokuna amai?
[Mashoko okukwezva vaverengi ari papeji 45]
“Ndakafunga kuti shamwarisikana yababa vangu yakanga ichitsiva amai vangu naizvozvo ndakanga ndine utsinye zvikuru kwairi”
[Mufananidzo uri papeji 43]
Kuroorazve kwomubereki kunowanzomutsa kunzwa kwokutsamwa, kwokusachengeteka, uye godo
[Mufananidzo uri papeji 46]
Chirango chinobva kumubereki nokuna amai chinowanzotsamwirwa