Ndingatani Ngati Anzanga Akundikakamiza Kugonana?

“Ndili pasukulu, munthu wina akanena kuti anagonanapo ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi, aliyense ankafuna atayesera kuchita zomwezo. Pajatu palibe amene amafuna kuoneka ngati wotsalira.”—Elaine, wazaka 21.

Kodi munayamba mwakhalapo ndi maganizo ofuna kugonana chabe chifukwa chakuti n’zimene anthu ambiri amachita?

Kodi munayamba mwakhalapo ndi maganizo ofuna kugonana chifukwa chakuti munthu amene mumamukonda akukukakamizani kuti mugonane?

Ngati ndi choncho, nkhaniyi ikuthandizani kuti musankhe zinthu mwanzeru komanso kuti mupewe kugonana chifukwa chokakamizidwa kapenanso chifukwa chakuti nanunso mukulakalaka kugonana.

• Zimene anthu ena amakhulupirira komanso zoona zake

• Zimene mungachite ngati mukukakamizidwa kugonana

• Zimene achinyamata anzanu amanena

Zimene anthu ena amakhulupirira komanso zoona zake

Zimene anthu ena amakhulupirira: Aliyense akumagonana (kapatulapo ineyo).

Zoona zake: Malinga ndi kafukufuku wina, pa achinyamata atatu alionse azaka 18, awiri ananena kuti anagonanapo kale ndi munthu wina. Koma zimenezi zikusonyeza kuti pali achinyamata ambiri amene sanagonanepo ndi munthu. Choncho, si zoona kuti “aliyense” akumagonana.

Zimene anthu ena amakhulupirira: Kugonana muli pachibwenzi kumathandiza kuti muzikondana kwambiri.

Zoona zake: Anyamata ambiri amakonda kunena mawu amenewa pofuna kunyengerera mtsikana kuti agonane naye, koma zimenezi si zoona. Nthawi zambiri mnyamata amathetsa chibwenzi akangogonana ndi mtsikana ndipo zimenezi zimakhumudwitsa kwambiri mtsikanayo chifukwa ankaganiza kuti mnyamatayo amamukonda komanso kumukhulupirira kwambiri.a

Zimene anthu ena amakhulupirira: Baibulo limanena kuti kugonana ndi kolakwika.

Zoona zake: Baibulo limatilimbikitsa kukhala ndi maganizo oyenera pa nkhani yogonana ndipo limanena kuti anthu okwatirana okha ndi amene ayenera kumagonana.—Genesis 1:28; 1 Akorinto 7:3.

Zimene anthu ena amakhulupirira: Kuyendera mfundo za m’Baibulo kutha kungondiika m’mavuto.

Zoona zake: Ngati mungapewe kugonana panopa n’kudikira pa nthawi yoyenera muli m’banja, mudzakhala osangalala kwambiri chifukwa simudzadziimba mlandu, kudandaula kapenanso kudziona ngati wosatetezeka chifukwa chogonana musanalowe m’banja.

Mfundo yofunika kwambiri: Palibe amene anawonongapo moyo wake chifukwa chodikira kaye n’kudzayamba kugonana akadzalowa m’banja. Koma anthu amene amagonana asanalowe m’banja amakumana ndi mavuto ambiri.

Zimene mungachite ngati mukukakamizidwa kugonana

• Musasiye kuyendera mfundo zamakhalidwe abwino. Baibulo limanena kuti anthu okhwima mwauzimu amagwiritsa ‘ntchito mphamvu zawo za kuzindikira, pophunzitsa mphamvuzo kusiyanitsa choyenera ndi chosayenera.’ (Aheberi 5:14) Anthu oterewa amayendera mfundo za m’Baibulo zomwe zimawathandiza kukanitsitsa kuchita chiwerewere ngakhale anzawo atawanyengerera.

  “Ndimachita khama kuti ndizichita zoyenera komanso kuti ndikhalebe ndi mbiri yabwino ndipo ndimapewa kuchita zinthu zomwe zingachititse kuti mbiri yanga iwonongeke.”—Alicia, wazaka 16.

  Zoti muganizire: Kodi mumafuna mutakhala ndi mbiri yotani? Kodi mungalole kuwononga mbiri yabwinoyo chifukwa chongofuna kusangalatsa munthu winawake?

• Muziganizira zotsatirapo zake. Baibulo limati: “Chilichonse chimene munthu wafesa, adzakololanso chomwecho.” (Agalatiya 6:7) Muzitha kuoneratu komanso kuganizira mmene moyo wanu ndi wa munthu winayo ungadzakhalire m’tsogolo ngati panopa mungagonane.b

  “Nthawi zambiri anthu amene amagonana asanalowe m’banja amadziimba mlandu, kunong’oneza bondo ngakhalenso kumva kuti sakukondedwa. Mavuto enanso ndi monga kutenga kapena kupereka mimba yosakonzekera ndiponso matenda opatsirana pogonana.”—Sienna, wazaka 16.

  Zoti muganizire: M’buku lina muli funso lakuti: “Anzanu akamakukakamizani kuti muchite zinthu zomwe zingakuikeni m’mavuto, kodi mungakonde kumachezabe nawo kapenanso kulola kuti azikupatsani malangizo?”—Sex Smart.

• Muzikhala ndi maganizo oyenera. Kugonana si kolakwika. Ndipotu Baibulo limanena kuti kugonana ndi mphatso imene mwamuna ndi mkazi okwatirana ayenera kusangalala nayo.—Miyambo 5:18, 19.

  “Kugonana ndi mphatso yabwino kwambiri imene Mulungu anatipatsa. Iye amafuna kuti tizisangalala nayo, koma pokhapokha ngati tili m’banja.”—Jeremy, wazaka 17.

  Zoti muganizire: Mudzayamba kugonana mukadzalowa m’banja. Pa nthawiyo, mudzasangalala kwambiri ndi mphatso imeneyi popanda kukumana ndi mavuto omwe atchulidwa kumayambiriro kwa nkhaniyi.