Kubi Yini Ukukhuluma Inhlamba?

Imibuzo

• Kukuphatha njani nxa usizwa abanye bekhuluma inhlamba kumbe bethethisa?

  • Akuthi thiki ngitsho ngikujayele.

  • Kuyangihlupha kancane kodwa besengikwamukela.

  • Kuyanginyanyisa angifuni lakukujayela.

• Ukhuluma inhlamba kangaki?

  • Angiqali ngitsho

  • Kwesinye isikhathi

  • Kanenginengi

• Ngokubona kwakho, iqakatheke kangakanani indaba yokukhuluma inhlamba kumbe ukuthethisa?

  • Yindaba encane nje

  • Yindaba enkulu

Okwenza sixoxe ngakho

Ngokubona kwakho ukukhuluma inhlamba kuyindaba enkulu yini? Mhlawumbe ungaphendula uthi: ‘Ngitsho. Zinengi inhlupho emhlabeni ezingasilalisa ngaphandle kwengubo hatshi lokhu. Phela wonke umuntu uyayikhuluma inhlamba.’ Liqiniso yini lelo?

Ubukwazi yini ukuthi banengi abantu abangayikhulumiyo inhlamba? Phela kukhona abakwaziyo, abanye abantu abangakwaziyo. Nanku okunye kwakhona:

• Ukukhuluma inhlamba kuveza okunengi ngathi. Ukukhuluma inhlamba kusitshela okunengi ngokusenhliziyweni yakho. Izikhathi ezinengi umuntu othanda ukuthethisa ngumuntu ongelandaba lokuthi abanye bazwa njani. Wena ungumuntu ongelandaba lokuthi abanye bazwa njani yini?

  IBhayibhili lithi: “Zonke izinto eziphuma emlonyeni zivela enhliziyweni.”—UMathewu 15:18.

  

• Ukuthanda inhlamba kungabangela ukuthi umuntu angathandwa ngabantu. Elinye ibhuku okuthiwa yi-Cuss Control lithi: “Indlela esikhuluma ngayo ingatsho ukuthi sizaba labangane abanjani, inhlonipho esizayiphiwa emulini lasemsebenzini, ubudlelwano esingaba labo labanye, isithunzi esingaba laso, ukuthi sizathola yini umsebenzi kumbe isikhundla esithile emsebenzini lokuthi abantu esingabaziyo bazasibona njani.” Liqhubeka lisithi: “Zibuze ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho labanye bungaba ngcono yini nxa ungayekela ukukhuluma inhlamba.”

  IBhayibhili lithi: ‘Susani kini ukuthethisa.’—Kwabase-Efesu 4:31.

• Ukuthethisa akwenzi abantu bakubuke. Kwelinye ibhuku lakhe, isikhwicamfundo okuthiwa ngu-Alex Packer wathi: “Kuyadina ukulalela abantu abahlala bekhuluma inhlamba.” Uqhubeka esithi ukukhuluma inhlamba kwenza umuntu ehluleke ukutshengisa ‘inhlakanipho, uzwelo, ukuzwisisa lokukhalipha. Nxa indlela okhuluma ngayo ingacaci futhi itshengisa ubuvila lokungacabangi, lengqondo yakho izabanjalo.’

  IBhayibhili lithi: “Akungaphumi ilizwi elibolileyo emilonyeni yenu.”—Kwabase-Efesu 4:29.

Ongakwenza

• Hlela ofuna ukukwenza. Zama ukuthi utshiye ukukhuluma inhlamba inyanga ingakapheli. Bhala kukhalenda loba etshathini ukuthi usuphumelele kangakanani. Nanku okunye okulandelayo okungakunceda. Ngokwesibonelo:

• Ungazilibazisi ngezinto ezigcwele inhlamba. Phela iBhayibhili lithi: “Ukuba lobudlelwano labantu abenza okubi kona ukuziphatha okuhle.” (1 KwabaseKhorinte 15:33, amabala angaphansi) Ukuba lobudlelwano lomuntu akupheleli kulabo esibabonayo kuphela, kodwa kugoqela lamafilimu esiwabukelayo, imidlalo yamavidiyo esiyidlalayo kanye lezingoma esizilalelayo. UKenneth oleminyaka engu-17, uthi: “Kulula ukuhlabela ingoma oyithandayo ukhohlwe lokuthi ilenhlamba ngenxa nje yokuthi imnandi.”

• Tshengisa ukuthi ukhululile. Abanye abantu bakhuluma inhlamba ngoba becabanga ukuthi kwenza bakhanye bengabantu abadala. Kodwa iqiniso yikuthi abantu abakhulileyo kumbe abalokholo oluqinileyo ‘sebazifundisa ukwehlukanisa okuhle lokubi besebenzisa amandla abo okuqedisisa.’ (KumaHebheru 5:14) Abayekeli ukwenza okuqondileyo ngenxa nje yokufuna ukubukwa.

Iqiniso yikuthi inhlamba yenza umuntu acabange izinto ezingcolileyo. Abantu abanengi emhlabeni lo banjalo. Ibhuku elithi Cuss Control lithi ‘ungangezeleli ebubini obuvele bukhona kodwa zama ukwenza ukuthi okukhulunywayo kuhlanzeke. Nxa ungenza njalo uzakuzwa ngcono futhi labanye abantu bazakuthanda.’