HELP FOR THE FAMILY | RAISING CHILDREN
When Your Young Son or Daughter Do Something That Make You Not to Trust Them
Some young people can’t stick to the time their parents set for them to come home. Some of them can even fool their parents by lying to them or hiding their self to leave the house just to be with their friend them. What you can do when your young son or daughter do something that make you not to trust them?
My young child not want listen to me again?
No, it not like that. The Bible say: “Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a youth.” And the way young people can act just show that what the Bible say that true. (Proverbs 22:15, footnote) Dr. Laurence Steinberg say, “Young people can rush and make some foolish decisions. So, you must expect that they will make some mistakes.”a
Suppose your young child been fooling you?
Don’t feel that your young child just decide to not listen to you. Research show that young people really care about what their parents think about them. Maybe your child feeling bad about himself that he na let you down, even if he not show it.b
Just how when your bone break, it can get better and be strong again, that the same way you can still trust your child even if he break your trust.
That who responsible?
That the environment? The Bible say: “Bad associations spoil useful habits.” (1 Corinthians 15:33) Young people know how to control their friend them. Also, other thing them like social media and the things the business people can be advertising can affect them too. To make it worst, young people not experience plenty things in life yet. So you can see the reason why sometime they can’t make good decisions. For them to be good person in the future, they must learn to take responsibility for the decisions they make.
What part I play? Maybe you can be thinking that you were too harsh on your child so that what make him to start misbehaving. Or maybe you thinking that you gave your child too much freedom. Instead of thinking on what part you play in the problem, think about what you can do now to solve the problem.
How I can help my young son or daughter to make me trust them again?
Control how you can react. Maybe your young son or daughter expect you to get vex. Try different way to handle the problem. Take your time to talk with your young child and see what cause the problem. He just wanted to know something? He was tire and all by himself? Or he really wanted to get friends? Even though none of this thing them suppose to make your child to do something wrong, but it can help you and your child to understand better what make them to do that wrong thing.
Bible advice: “Be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger.”—James 1:19.
Help your young child to think on what happen. Ask questions like, what you learn from this experience? The next time you face this same situation, wetin you will do? This kind na question them can help your young child to think good-good.
Bible advice: “Reprove, reprimand, exhort, with all patience and art of teaching.”—2 Timothy 4:2.
Give punishment. The best way to help your child that to give him punishment in line with what he did. For example, suppose your young child hide himself and go spend time with his friend them, wetin you must do? Maybe you can reduce the amount of time he can spend with his friends.
Bible advice: “Whatever a person is sowing, this he will also reap.”—Galatians 6:7.
Focus on how you can help your child to make you trust him again. It will take some time for this one to happen. Your young child must know that as time go by, you can still trust him again. If your young child feel that you will never trust him again, it will make him to give up.
Bible advice: “Do not be exasperating your children, so that they do not become downhearted.”—Colossians 3:21.